At family gatherings, play 'please pass the politics'
Am I wrong in the choice I made?
-- Wondering
Dear Wondering: You shouldn't have to provide DNA percentage to stake a claim to your own identity. I was not previously aware of an official ethnic group called specifically "Irish-American," but in researching your question I see that according to the 2017 American Community Survey an estimated 32.6 million Americans identify as Irish-Americans, so you are part of a very large group. (Knowing this puts the mad celebrations surrounding St. Patrick's Day in Chicago into perspective.)
Your Aboriginal DNA sounds particularly intriguing. You must have claimed this ancestry in some context, which is why others have commented on your choice, but without any personal or cultural experiences to link it to, I can understand why you don't identify with it.
Dear Amy: "Stuck" was a military wife whose husband lived elsewhere. You described her as "a single parent." I take great exception to that. She has a husband in the military. Like many military families, they are separated, but he is still her husband and the kids' father. He may co-parent from a distance, but she is not a single parent.
-- Military Wife
Dear Wife: I understand the distinction you are making, but "Stuck" never mentioned her husband participating in their parenting life. Her question was about doing it alone. "de-facto single parent" might have been a better word choice for me.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
