ArcaMax

-- On Fire in California

Dear On Fire: Sexual compatibility is as important at your stage in life as it was when you were younger. Yes, there may be fewer compatible men available to you at your age, but they are out there. For instance, sexually transmitted diseases among your age group are high and rising; "seniors" are sexually active. (I hope you always practice safe sex.)

It is possible that men in your age group are especially sensitive, but you should also take stock of how you express your own wants and needs, in order to decode how you are communicating your desires and expectations. It might be best for you to be candid early on, versus perhaps waiting to develop an emotional connection before you experience a sexual one.

You don't say how you are meeting men, but there are online matching sites that might be better suited to someone with a higher sex drive. And yes, a younger man might be the hot ticket for you.

Dear Amy: I'm a romantically inexperienced teen girl. I've never had a real first kiss or been on a date. At 16, I know I don't *need* a partner, but I want one. I've tried being shy and sweet. I've said "fork this" and asked people out, but they've all refused.

I can be pretty. I'm somewhat ambitious, and I'm smart. I don't think I'm horrible. And yet I have no idea how to catch the interest of anyone who's my type (outgoing and confident). I feel helpless because they don't want me, and creepy because -- what if I'm making them uncomfortable?

I am homeschooled, but have made many efforts to meet other people my age. Do you have any tips? I'm tired of feeling desperate and creepy.

-- Plain Eponine

Dear Plain: I feel like "young Amy" is writing me a letter! I was a lot like you when I was your age.

Your impulses are not weird or creepy. They are normal.

...continued