Has social media flipped the relationship pyramid?
There was so much support from people who took the time to comment and offer love and sympathy to someone they'd never met. I carried that warmth for a long time and it helped the healing process.
It has been 13 years now since we lost our unborn child, and I wrestled with the guilt of having a child that lived, and one that died.
After the experience of writing you, the nature of that grief and intense guilt have subsided. It doesn't "invade" life as often as it once did. There are still triggers that pop up unexpectedly, but the intensity has lessened.
The guilt is now gone. My two children's stories are intertwined. Feeling happy for one and sad for the other doesn't take away from the other child's place in our lives. It just is.
Thank you so much for taking the time to publish and answer my letter. It made a huge difference to me.
-- A Mom
Dear A: Thank you for this update. Grief is like a river. It flows, pools, plunges, and eddies. I'm especially heartened that compassion from readers has helped you to cope with your loss.
Dear Amy: Like "Self Talker," I also "talk to myself," but I consider it thinking out loud.
I believe we all do it in one form or another, whether it's vocalizing our thoughts or talking to our pets.
-- Thinking Out Loud
Dear Thinking: If talking to our pets qualifies as talking to ourselves, then I am a very, very, good boy!
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: ASKAMY@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
