Grandfather's death leaves many open questions
You seem overly invested in controlling a specific outcome. Yes, of course, your daughter will eventually learn about her grandfather's death. But your stated concern about your young daughter's "health history" seems disingenuous.
Are you focused on this death more than other deaths in the family? And if so, why? Would you be as eager to explain a grandparent's death from cancer to a young child as you are to discuss this suicide?
For family survivors of suicide, there is a distinct sort of pain and grief that is mixed with confusion, anger and -- yes -- sometimes shame. But this is your husband's father you're talking about. Let him handle this, and be supportive of him -- even if he struggles.
The narrative, like the loss, might be messy. You do not have the right to pre-empt this discussion for your own reasons.
When your daughter learns of this, make sure that you and her father also tell her about the fullness of her grandfather's life, so that his death alone doesn't define him. Your compassion toward him will guide your daughter.
Dear Amy: I have a female relative who frequents a psychic.
She then uses her visits to fuel conversations at family gatherings, frequently embarrassing other family members.
For example, she once reported back that her psychic had told her that my husband and I were having marital problems! I replied that every marriage has its ups and downs.
However, despite my negative reaction, she continues this pattern of behavior.
I have visited psychics myself, and I thought the purpose was to enlighten you about your own life, not to be nosy about friends and relatives.
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