Boyfriend ponders optimal timing for break-up
The most challenging thing to do is to lean into the uncertainty. You should not pre-emptively make your girlfriend's choices by deciding to break up with her. Many people relocate to be near a partner, and there are worse reasons to choose a post-college landing place. The choice should be hers -- and hers alone.
What she shouldn't do is try to emotionally manipulate you into reversing your own plans. If she chooses to move, it will be of her own volition, and she will be responsible for her happiness. If she blames or resents you for a choice she is making, then she is not quite ready for adulthood.
Dear Amy: I received a save-the-date card for a nephew's wedding.
My nephew lives 3,000 miles away, and I have never had a relationship with him.
I tried to have a relationship early on, but he was always obnoxious to me and I gave up, so he's pretty much a stranger to me.
My relationship with his mother (my sister) is strained.
I really don't want to go, and to be honest, I don't want to send a present to someone who has never been nice to me. I have never met his fiancee.
What is the polite way of dealing with this?
Should I reply now that I cannot come and save them the expense of sending me an official wedding invitation, or should I wait for the invitation and then respond?
Do I need to send a gift? I know that normally one doesn't need to if not attending, but he is my nephew.
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