ArcaMax

Dear Amy: Recently, I attended an HD Performance of the Metropolitan Opera at my local theater. There was a five-minute change of sets between acts.

The camera showed maintenance people changing the scenery. The lights in the movie theater were still dimmed and I took out my iPhone to check the time. A man sitting two seats down harshly yelled, "Will you turn that phone off?!"

Others in the theater were checking their phones, as this was simply a set change (but not intermission).

Amy, I wasn't sitting in the orchestra pit at the opera house. The performance had stopped and I was in a movie theater.

What is the protocol about taking a split-second glance at one's phone in this situation?

-- Not Singing in Middletown, RI

Dear Not Singing: Your neighbor's reaction seems ... operatic. All the same, by your own admission, this was not an "intermission," but a set change. (One thing I really enjoy about viewing these opera simulcasts is the enjoyment of watching how the stage hands -- not "maintenance people" -- wrangle the enormous sets. It's a fascinating backstage glimpse of how large productions work and can enhance your enjoyment of the opera, itself.)

These days, a glance at your phone is the same as glancing at your watch. However, in a darkened theater, your phone's glow will definitely distract others. And unfortunately, many glancing time checks turn into text-checks, voicemail checks, email checks and quick Facetime sessions with the grandkids. Checking the time should be fine -- but not performing other functions.

Also understand that opera lovers aren't like movie-goers; they pay a premium on a special day to view an art form they love. When asking you to put your phone away, the gentleman should have gone sotto voce.

Dear Amy: I loved your response to "Anxious," the parent who was worried about the appropriate reaction when her child hit another in the face during a snowball fight. My favorite line: "It's a snowball fight, not the Untouchables."

-- A Fan

Dear Fan: I wondered how many readers would catch that reference. Here's the applicable quote from the movie: "He pulls a knife, you pull a gun. He sends one of yours to the hospital; you send one of his to the morgue! It's the Chicago way...!"

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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)