Self-Exam

I Yam What I Yam

Call it a spud spat or tater tiff, but in the back offices of the U.S. Dietary Guidelines Advisory Committee, there is talk of removing the potato's designation as a vegetable and recategorizing it as a grain.

Naturally, there is opposition, principally from Big Potato, which views the vegetable designation to be good for business, even if nutritionally speaking, potatoes are more like a refined carbohydrate.

A spokesperson for the National Potato Council predicts a "chaotic outcome" if potatoes lose their veggie luster.

The current dietary guidelines are under review, with new ones slated to debut in 2025. There's still time for opposing forces to see eye to eye, or in this case, eyes to eyes.

Body of Knowledge

For the approximately 10% of readers who are left-handed:

If you are left-handed, chances are your mother was also left-handed, but your father was right-handed. A woman over the age of 40 is 28% more likely to bear a left-handed child. A premature infant is five times more likely to be left-handed. Left-handers tend to use their right hands more frequently than right-handers use their left hands.

Experts claim that when they walk into a room, left-handers tend to turn left and right-handers tend to turn right. Left-handers tend to be better at algebra; the reason, suggest some, is that their brains are better suited to dealing with the abstract.

Artists, musicians and academic women are more likely than average to be left-handed. but also have an advantage as musicians because the regions of their brains that deal with sound are larger and better developed.

A larger percentage of left-handers than right-handers smoke cigarettes, which may partially explain why right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.

Counts

1 in 9 -- Ratio of U.S. children, ages 5-17, who have received a diagnosis of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)

Source: National Health Interview Survey

Doc Talk

Otitis externa -- an infection of the skin lining the ear canal of the outer ear; also known as swimmer's ear

Phobia of the Week

Omphalophobia -- fear of belly buttons (innies and outies)

Best Medicine

Q: Why did the urologist lose his license?

A: He got in trouble with his peers.

Observation

"I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness." -- Bill Watterson (Calvin and Hobbes)

Medical History

This week in 1923, insulin became generally available for diabetics' use. First discovered in 1922, insulin is now broadly used (an estimated 8.4 million Americans) for the daily treatment of diabetes. Insulin, a natural and vital hormone for carbohydrate metabolism in the body, is manufactured by the pancreas. An overabundance of insulin causes insulin shock and leads to a variety of symptoms, including coma. It is extracted from the pancreas of sheep and oxen; it is also synthesized in the laboratory.

Ig Nobel Apprised

The Ig Nobel Prizes celebrate achievements that make people laugh, then think. A look at real science that's hard to take seriously, and even harder to ignore.

In 1998, the Ig Nobel Prize in physics went to Deepak Chopra for his unique interpretation of quantum physics as it applies to life, liberty and the pursuit of economic happiness. Quantum physics explains how extremely small objects simultaneously have characteristics of both particles (tiny pieces of matter) and waves (a disturbance or variation that transfers energy). Chopra has since built a wellness empire selling books, treatments and paraphernalia. He sold his company last year for $20 million, so he's definitely figured out the part about pursuing economic happiness.

Q: Why do you sweat after you shower?

A: Post-shower perspiration is the result of residual heat -- those still-hot droplets of shower water clinging to your body and triggering a cooling response from it in the form of sweat. The way to avoid being sweaty after a shower is simple, suggest experts: You gradually lower the temperature of the shower, dialing it down every 10 seconds or so, from hot to warm or cool, washing away any sweat and adjusting your body's thermostat. Moving to a cooler or less steamy environment to towel off also helps.

Medical Myths

The old "cut and suck" method of aiding a snakebite victim has been largely discredited, though it persists because, well, it looks like a pretty cool and dramatic way to save a life. In fact, trying to suck the venom out of a snake bite is counterproductive. The venom spreads through the victim's system very quickly, too fast to effectively suck much out. Also, cutting and sucking on the wound is likely to increase the risk of infection and cause further tissue damage.

The current recommendation is to not touch a snake bite wound and seek immediate medical assistance, keeping the victim as calm as possible. Remove any tight clothing in the event of swelling, and do not drink caffeine or alcohol that can increase heart rate. And remember what the snake looks like so you can describe it to doctors.

Last Words

"I feel sick. The dog is sick, too. We are both ill. It must be something we have eaten." -- French novelist and playwright Emile Zola (1840-1902) as he lay dying of carbon monoxide poisoning from an improperly ventilated chimney

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To find out more about Scott LaFee and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.