Trump might have incriminated himself when he tweeted that he had to fire Flynn because he lied to Mike Pence and the FBI. You can tell Trump was scared, ’cuz his next tweet was “Hashtag JK LOL.”
A tour guide was showing a tourist around Washington, D. C. The guide pointed out the place where George Washington supposedly threw a dollar across the Potomac River.
"That's impossible," said the tourist. "No one could ...Read More
When my sister Andrea got married, she asked to wear my mother's wedding dress. The day she tried it on for the first time I was sitting with Mother in the living room as Andrea descended the stairs. The gown was a perfect...Read More
If you don't like my work, tell everyone. I like my name to be popular in conversations. I was born to be whipped.
If you have special instructions for a job, don't write them down. In fact, save them until the job is ...Read More
Because of a minor infraction, a shipmate of mine aboard the USS Reeves, bound for Japan, was busted one rank, fined and given extra duty for three weeks. Looking forward to celebrating his 21st birthday on July 22, he ...Read More
At his 103rd birthday party, my grandfather was asked if he planned to be around for his 104th.
"I certainly do," he replied. "Statistics show that very few people die between the ages of 103 and 104."
Kevin Hart tries to reach Dwayne Johnson to brag about co-hosting The Tonight Show but can't reach him - luckily, Jimmy gets through.