7 important life lessons learned from 'This Is Us'

Elizabeth Wellington, The Philadelphia Inquirer on

Published in Entertainment News

1. Our family story shapes our purpose

Jack is a devoted father and an attentive husband. His unexpected death in the 1980s leaves a lasting impact on his children, who remember him as perfect. Yet we learn that Jack's father, Stanley (Peter Onorati), was abusive and Jack is trying not to repeat those patterns. Jack doesn't see his mother Marilyn (Laura Neimi) after she moves to Ohio to escape the abuse. And when Jack died, he was estranged from his brother, Nicky (Griffin Dunne). By revealing his childhood rooted in trauma, we better understand why Jack treats his family with the utmost care and see the power and possibility of being able to escape one's upbringing and create one's destiny.

2. Cultural competency matters

The Pearsons raise Randall with love. However, he never feels quite like he belongs. He's more book smart than his siblings, and the family treats his Blackness like an elephant in the room. Randall searches for and finds his birth parents (Ron Cephas Jones and Jennifer C. Holmes). But he isn't able to fully deal with his anxiety until his Black therapist, Dr. Vance (Keith Powell), encourages Randall to tell his adoptive family that by treating his race like it doesn't matter, they are ignoring Randall's full humanity. This is real and a reminder of the importance of embracing, rather than ignoring, cultural differences.

3. Perspective matters

When we meet Kevin, he's an actor in Los Angeles and the star of a fictional sitcom, The Manny. He's rich, famous and a lady-killer, but he still feels like a loser who will never amount to anything because he thinks he doesn't measure up to the studious and accomplished Randall. Kevin is also an alcoholic, like his father and grandfather. It's not until Kevin starts to believe in his inherent goodness and has children of his own that he stops drinking and is able to enjoy his life. It's a good reminder that just because someone's life looks perfect doesn't mean it is.

4. Love always wins

Relationships are hard on "This Is Us" but always worth it. Kevin marries young, cheats on his young wife Sophie, but by the season finale Kevin and Sophie (Alexandra Breckenridge) have remarried. We see Randall's adopted daughter, Deja, fall in love and break up with a high school sweetheart, but by the season finale, they also find their way back to each other. The show didn't limit this lesson to just romance, either: Kate and Toby (Chris Sullivan) marry, have children, and are terrible parents when they are together. After their divorce they become great co-parents and ultimately find their true loves.


5. Forgiveness is not optional

When Randall, now living in Philadelphia, catches a burglar in his townhouse in the Art Museum neighborhood, the situation triggers anxiety for the fictional city councilman. Later he learns the robber is a drug addict with mental health issues, and he helps find him treatment and a place to live. Randall also forgives his birth parents for abandoning him and his adoptive parents for putting their comfort level ahead of embracing all of who Randall is.

6. Mental health matters

Randall faced his anxiety head on and became a U.S. senator. Kate dealt with self-esteem issues and built a curriculum for blind children. Kevin launches a new version of his late father's business after dealing with alcoholism and self-worth. Only by working through mental health issues, and confronting the ghosts of their past that contributed to them, could the Pearson kids have full lives and erase the demons of insecurity.

7. Everything happens for a reason

At the beginning of the series, Rebecca loses a triplet and adopts abandoned Randall. Kate goes to an obesity support group. She doesn't lose weight, but she meets Toby. Jack and Miguel (John Huertas) are best friends. It's Miguel who helps Rebecca with Jack's loss and eventually Rebecca and Miguel marry. And Jack dies the very moment a young man, Marcus Brooks, survives a car accident; Marcus grows up to become a doctor who develops drugs that treat Alzheimer's patients, like Rebecca.

Above all else, so reminds us that there are no accidents in life.

(c)2022 The Philadelphia Inquirer Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.


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