Life Advice
/Health
Family Makes Insinuations About Child's Dna
DEAR HARRIETTE: I have ginger hair and hazel-brown eyes, while my wife is a brunette with brown eyes. Despite our genetics, our 2-year-old child is dark-haired with blue eyes with a speck of green. My mother and sister cannot stop insinuating that my wife may have cheated on me. I consistently reject this idea and have become increasingly ...Read more
Company Offers Job To Wrong Candidate
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm being offered a job I'm not qualified for. Should I accept it?
During a recent job application event, there was a process that tested each person's comprehension and attention to detail. The person who used the computer before me did not close his tab, revealing his almost perfect result. I didn't think much of it at the ...Read more
Father Asks Newly Employed Child For Money
DEAR HARRIETTE: I find myself in a difficult situation with my father. I recently graduated from college and secured a job, but my father keeps asking me for money. The challenging part is that he didn't contribute financially to my college education, and he hasn't supported me financially since before I turned 18. While I understand that he may...Read more
Friends Struggle To Reconcile After Falling Out
DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a huge falling out with one of my best friends. We hadn't spoken for about three months until the other day, when we got together to talk. We shed a lot of tears and spoke our minds about what happened between us, but we didn't find resolution. I walked away feeling like I was being blamed for something that I don't think ...Read more
Woman With New Job Losing Touch With Friends
DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my closest friends recently landed a new job that pays significantly better than the positions held by the rest of our friend group. While I'm genuinely happy for her success, her behavior since starting this job has been a cause for concern. Ever since she got this job, she's developed an air of superiority. She ...Read more
Sister Chooses To Spend Time With New Boyfriend
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm feeling a bit lost and hurt lately because my sister, who used to be my closest friend, seems to have disappeared since getting into a relationship with her new boyfriend. She's been spending all of her time with him, leaving little room for our sisterly bond. I am not the only one who feels this way; she has also pushed away...Read more
Sister Contemplates Maid Of Honor Tradition
DEAR HARRIETTE: My family has five women -- four sisters and me -- and it has become a silent tradition that for each sibling's wedding, the next in line serves as the maid of honor.
This year, it's my turn to get married, and, being the fourth sibling, I should be asking my youngest sister. I'm not super-close to my younger sister due to an ...Read more
After Losing Weight, Woman Gets More Attention
DEAR HARRIETTE: I've recently noticed the stark contrast in how people treat you based on how much you weigh. I used to binge eat excessively, then go days without eating due to overwhelming guilt. Despite this habit, I was overweight.
Having shed 89 pounds since then, I now fall into the category of conventionally skinny, and people now call ...Read more
Aunt Struggles With Financial Burden Of Gift
DEAR HARRIETTE: My "nephew" -- my cousin's son -- is very dear to me. He has autism and sometimes displays violent behavior. Last year, his school recommended that he be transferred to a private institution specializing in educating children with special needs. I am a 23-year-old server, and, as you can imagine, I don't earn much. My nephew's ...Read more
Woman Seeks Clarity About Group Travel Expenses
DEAR HARRIETTE: I have an upcoming birthday trip planned in Hawaii, and I'm unsure about the etiquette of asking the people I've invited to contribute toward the cost of the trip. These are mostly close friends and acquaintances from college. Is it considered acceptable to request that guests pay a share for the trip, or is this not a common ...Read more
Daughter Upset When Parents Cut Her Off
DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I have recently made a decision that's caused a lot of tension in our family, particularly with our 22-year-old daughter. She now has a stable full-time job, and we've decided to cut off her financial support completely. Understandably, she's extremely upset about this. We've always striven to provide for our ...Read more
Newlywed Notices Husband's Attention Drifting
DEAR HARRIETTE: I got married to my husband about seven months ago after dating him for five years, and while I expected some adjustments in our relationship, I've been feeling a significant shift lately. It seems like my husband is pulling away, and it's leaving me feeling confused and insecure. Before we got married, we were so connected and ...Read more
Lender Wants To Ask For Money Back From Boyfriend
DEAR HARRIETTE: Is it considered inappropriate or unreasonable if I request money back that my boyfriend borrowed? I know that there is a fine line between borrowing and giving, especially in a relationship. My boyfriend bought a car but then faced a layoff due to low profits at his workplace. Over a period of four months, I covered his car ...Read more
Cousin Allows Family To Stay In Cramped Apartment
DEAR HARRIETTE: My cousin "Sheila" agreed to split the rent with me when she moved into my apartment, with me covering the entire deposit. Our apartment has two rooms, one for my fiance and me, and the other for Sheila and her boyfriend. I am a person with a physical disability and constant need of a wheelchair, so the limited space in the ...Read more
Intern Outperforming Friend At Job
DEAR HARRIETTE: I landed an internship at my local city hall within the legislative sector, thanks to a recommendation from a friend who is employed there. This friend's mother shares a personal connection with one of the councilors, which is how my friend got the job.
I am interested in this job and its scope, so I naturally excel in the role....Read more
Father Refuses To Help With Daughter's Care Tasks
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am upset with my husband because he thinks that it isn't his responsibility to do our daughter's hair -- ever. He thinks that since he's a man, any responsibility that is deemed feminine isn't his job. I've tried explaining that parenting responsibilities should be shared equally, regardless of gender stereotypes, but he's ...Read more
Teacher Having Trouble Connecting With Student
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a high school teacher facing a challenging situation with one of my students, and I'm at a loss for how to improve our relationship. Despite my best efforts to make a positive and supportive classroom environment, it seems like this particular student and I just can't seem to see eye to eye. Our interactions are often tense, ...Read more
Frugal Reader Steals To Save Money
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a 25-year-old living in an expensive city in the United States. I've always been frugal, but lately, this mindset has led me down a troubling path. I've found myself giving in to the temptation to steal items from stores rather than purchase them. At first, it seemed like a harmless way to save a few dollars, but now I can't...Read more
Woman Yearns For Appreciation In Relationship
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a 30-year-old woman who's fallen hard for a man I feel doesn't truly love me. I've been with my partner for five years now, and while I love him dearly, I can't shake the feeling that he doesn't appreciate everything I do for us as a couple. I find myself going above and beyond to make our relationship work -- from planning ...Read more
Attempted Theft Of Ring Threatens Friendship
DEAR HARRIETTE: This week, I invited one of my friends over to my apartment to have dinner. We were having a great time. As the night came to an end and she was walking out, I spotted a ring on her finger that looked familiar. I told her that I have a ring that looks just like that, and I asked if I could see it up close. I had accidentally ...Read more