This RV is only big enough for one set of grandkids
If I could, I would prevent Gary from ever attending any family events where Tom and his family will be present.
-- Ready to Move Forward
Dear Ready: If you definitely want to exclude your brother, you will have to be brave enough to tell him. Describe your decision as a consequence of his behavior.
However, you could be frank, give him a chance to behave differently, and leave the final choice up to him.
Tell him, "Tom and I are getting married. We would like to include you, but you have made it clear that you don't support our union. If you can't be supportive and respectful toward us and his family, then you should definitely stay home."
Dear Amy: I was appalled by your response to "Confused by a Cheapskate," whose boyfriend never shared expenses. You suggested she slide the restaurant check toward him quietly to see what he would do. That is passive-aggressive.
-- Upset
Dear Upset: I was working on the theory that "Confused" might be leaping in to pick up the check to avoid forcing the issue. Waiting would reveal her boyfriend's choice.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook. Amy Dickinson's memoir, "The Mighty Queens of Freeville: A Mother, a Daughter and the Town that Raised Them" (Hyperion), is available in bookstores.)
