Life Advice
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When Money Changes the Story
I remember picking up my first campaign check from the P.O. box I had rented. I knew the name: a gruff older man in the community who had stopped me at a social function to ask if I was indeed running for office. Now I held his writing in my hands, a small bid for support in a realm I had very little experience in.
There's energy in that ...Read more
Asking Eric: Couple considers breakup after years of drinks and drugs
Dear Eric: I am 71 and have a “boyfriend” who is 79. We have been a couple for more than 10 years however during that time we only saw one another on average once a week for various reasons, such as he is an hour away, we are at different stages in life and we both like our space.
It was a fun relationship with lots of drinking and some ...Read more
Friend's Interruptions Make Me Feel Invisible
Dear Annie: I have a best friend whom I love dearly, and we have been close for years. She is funny, generous and has been there for me during some difficult times. But lately I have noticed a pattern that is starting to wear on me.
Whenever I try to tell her something about my life, she interrupts before I can finish and somehow turns the ...Read more
Good Neighbor Learns Inclusivity Has Limits
DEAR ABBY: I am a single woman in a friendly neighborhood. Every month, I have the neighbors over for dinner and a movie. I like to be inclusive -- bring the kids, bring the dogs! One couple recently had their elderly mom move in, and I installed a ramp so she could join us. Babies cry, dogs bark, women breastfeed, but all are welcome. I put ...Read more
Asking Eric: Ill sister won’t seek medical care
Dear Eric: I have a problem with my sister. She’s 71 years old and for the past two years she has had several medical issues. One in particular is very debilitating and makes it very difficult for her to walk.
She has not been to a doctor for at least 10 years and even though she doesn’t feel well, she refuses to see a doctor because she is...Read more
Fashion Student Worried About Being Rude
DEAR HARRIETTE: I moved away from my small town in Ohio to go to fashion school in New York City. When I was out and about, a girl stopped me at the train station and asked me who I was. When I confirmed my name, she exclaimed that we went to school together and she graduated a few years before me. We chitchatted for a bit about how we've been ...Read more
Throw The Party You Wish To See In The World
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm turning 30 and decided this would be a great age to throw a birthday party. My long-term partner recently left me, and I really want to show my friends how much I appreciate them being in my life.
When I've gone to events after COVID, I've noticed they have a lot less structure and are overall less formal. While I do want...Read more
Husband Crosses the Line Online
Dear Annie: My husband has recently become obsessed with Twitter. He spends hours a day on his computer away from his family. I've supported this unusual hobby until recently.
I noticed he and another female Tweeter calling each other "besties," and they have cute nicknames for each other. I confronted my husband about it, and he told me that...Read more
Tensions Rise After Workplace Romance Breakup
DEAR ABBY: I am a man in my 40s. A woman and I had a relationship that ended badly. We met on the job, though we work in different departments. Everyone knows about our previous relationship, and it is extremely awkward. Every time I walk by, there are lots of smiles and chattering; when I approach my co-workers' desks, I'm greeted with silence ...Read more
Asking Eric: Friend uses couple for their pool
Dear Eric: I am the older partner in a gay relationship. We have a mutual friend (John) who we have invited to our home four times for a swim and dinner. He has never invited us to his home to reciprocate for dinner, has never brought a bottle of wine or any gift of appreciation, has never sent us a thank you note or email, and never brings a ...Read more
Daughter's Roommate Won't Reciprocate Kindness
DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter is going through a lot of drama with her post-grad roommate, and I don't know how to help her. My daughter has gone above and beyond to help her roommate adjust to living in Los Angeles. My daughter introduced her roommate to many of her friends and has helped her feel more confident. Recently, the roommate got sick, ...Read more
Noisy Party Plus Curious Neighbor Equals Drink-In-Face
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Starting about 1 p.m., my next-door neighbors began a very loud party. It was Saturday afternoon, and I've been on the other side of "too much noise" complaints myself once or twice, so I decided to be tolerant.
After several hours of very loud, pounding music that necessitated closing my windows so that I could hear my TV, I...Read more
Family Chat or Political Forum?
Dear Annie: My entire extended family is in a group chat together. Sometimes it's fun, and sometimes it's useful, but most of the time it's just noisy. The worst offender is my cousin "Daniel." At least once a week, he sends political rants, tweets and reels to the chat. It's wearing on everyone, especially my mom's side of the family, which ...Read more
Friend Grows Distant After Personal Struggle
DEAR ABBY: A dear friend of 10 years experienced a severe mental health crisis. I did my best to reach out to her, but she pushed me away and flaked on plans and important events at the last minute at least a dozen times. Once her mental health began to improve, I approached her and told her I understood her behavior had been largely out of her ...Read more
'The nicest situation I could ask for': Why young some adults are opting to live at home
CHICAGO -- Mary Kate Reilly’s after-work routine is familiar and comforting. Her 50-minute commute ends at her childhood home in Tinley Park, Illinois, where her mom is waiting when she walks in; she shares a meal and relaxes with her parents afterward as they watch reality TV.
It’s a living situation the 23-year-old did not exactly ...Read more
Asking Eric: Parents want to be included in vacation activities despite mobility challenges
Dear Eric: My husband and I have had many wonderful trips with my parents over the years. We have always invited them on our family vacations with the kids and had a, generally, wonderful time.
They are both in their 80s. I’m grateful that they are still a big part of our lives and are both able to travel, but we have noticed significant ...Read more
Employee Worried About Being Overlooked For Promotion
DEAR HARRIETTE: Over the years, I have become extremely specific with my scheduling, which encouraged me to also become extremely efficient at work. I try to get all my work done within work hours. I generally leave work at 5 p.m. on the dot. I am not doing essential or life-saving work, so I no longer feel the need to overextend myself by ...Read more
Woes Of A Would-Be Party Planner
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am flummoxed. On two separate occasions, I have offered to host a birthday party for a friend. They were both enthusiastically receptive to my offer.
In each case, I asked for their guest list with email addresses to send e-vites to their invitees. I also asked each birthday girl for any favorite appetizers or beverages, so...Read more
Going for Gold in Grief
Dear Annie: I have two sisters, and one of them, "Joanie," tragically passed away from cancer last year. It's obviously been hard, but what's making it harder is my remaining sister. She has always been competitive. And she has somehow turned even grief into a competition.
For example, a few weeks ago I mentioned I hadn't slept the night ...Read more
Hornswoggled Husband Prepares To Cast Wife Aside
DEAR ABBY: My husband (80) and I (72) have been married 25 years. This is the second marriage for both of us. Until three years ago, I felt I had a wonderful relationship with his family, so it's hard to deal with what he's done to me and my relationships with them.
A new daughter-in-law, "Jean," who has a granddaughter, "Sophie," has fostered ...Read more
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