Life Advice
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Single File: Walking Single File
Married or not, each of us walks single file through life's landscape, because everyone has a "single" part, our unique individuality -- separate and apart from the crowd. Yet from time to time, we may travel in lockstep, two by two, when someone we like comes nearby and walks with us. Drawn by love's force, this person may stay with us for a ...Read more
Asking Eric: Friend’s outburst ruins game night
Dear Eric: A group of seven elders – men and women, ages 60 to 90 – have gotten together once a week to play poker at my unit in our condo building for almost two years. As my husband and I are the only couple, we provide the food, set up the game with chips. My husband is disabled and an introvert, so this is the only way that entertaining ...Read more
Parent Wishes Son Would Call More Often
DEAR HARRIETTE: My son rarely calls me or reaches out to me, and it makes me question whether I did something wrong raising him. He is now a sophomore at a college halfway across the country. I was sad to see him go away, but I assumed he would call me first sometimes. I thought wrong; if I want to hear from him, I need to call him. What hurts ...Read more
Raise A Glass (Of Water) To Freedom
DEAR MISS MANNERS: At a company holiday party, one of my colleagues decided not to partake of the wine that was offered. During a round of toasts, she was admonished -- in a good-natured way -- by co-workers, for raising her water glass. They said toasting someone with water is bad luck.
Aside from the luck angle, is there an etiquette rule ...Read more
Put Peace First in 2026
Dear Readers: Before we rush into a brand-new year, I want to pause and say thank you. Thank you for reading, for writing in and for trusting me with the parts of your life you don't always share at the dinner table. Thank you for letting this corner of the page be a place where we can talk about the messy, meaningful work of being human. I ...Read more
Asking Eric: Sister sends gifts despite repeated requests to stop
Dear Eric: My husband’s family has a long-standing tradition of not buying Christmas gifts for adults, just the small children. It keeps Christmas less hectic and allows us to concentrate on what’s important: spending time together as a large extended family.
Years ago, I suggested to my highly dysfunctional family a similar approach. Most ...Read more
Game Show Participation Could Cost Job
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently got cast on a game show that I've watched for years and I've always wanted to be on! This is a dream come true and very exciting; however, filming it takes about 45 days. I don't have enough vacation time from my job, so if I go on the show, I would have to quit my job. I didn't think that I would get this far in the ...Read more
Sometimes Incredulity Is The Best Response
DEAR MISS MANNERS: When I meet new people and tell them where I earned my bachelor's degree and what my plans for the future are, I frequently get comments and questions such as, "Wow, you must be really smart," or "Did you do well on the MCAT?" or "What was your GPA?"
Having been raised to consider this information personal, I am unsure how to...Read more
Life's Messy Moments Count the Most
Dear Annie: Every December, my life starts to feel like one of those "year in review" videos -- only mine looks more like the blooper reel.
Back in January, I sat at my kitchen table with a brand-new planner, a cinnamon latte and all the determination in the world. I even wrote, "This Is Jenna's Year" in big blue letters on the first page. I ...Read more
Friend's Comments Have Fallen Short of Friendly
DEAR ABBY: I am a very overweight woman, but down 50 pounds from my top weight and continuing at a consistent, but slow, rate to lose. My A1C is now down to pre-diabetic, so I know my efforts are making a difference. I recently had a terrible bout of sciatica and pain in an arthritic knee, which kept me from some anticipated travel.
A good (so ...Read more
Ask Dating Coach Erika: What if I can't tell what they look like in their profile?
As someone who views hundreds or maybe even thousands of dating profiles per week, let’s just say that I’ve seen a lot of dating profile photos. Too many dating profile photos. So, I know a thing or two about a good photo. I know even more about a bad picture ... and how one seemingly deceptive photo can turn into a left swipe faster than ...Read more
Asking Eric: New friend group brings up old insecurities
Dear Eric: After 38 years of military and Department of Defense service, I retired and moved to my current home eight years ago (in a town I've never lived in before). I became friends with a woman two years ago and she introduced me to her larger circle of friends (about 19 women). Since then, I've become close with her and her best friend and ...Read more
Husband Refuses To Help With Basic Tasks
DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I got into a fight, and I feel like it revealed a lot about what he thinks about me. For context, I was going on a work trip for two days, and I asked my husband if he could take care of the dog and be there when the handyman came over to fix our bathroom sink. I had already scheduled the time when the handyman was...Read more
Let's Presume Good Intentions -- Most Of The Time
DEAR MISS MANNERS: When did people become so insecure that they take offense at pretty much everything?
I've noticed a huge shift. Compliments given by strangers are now considered an insult or an attack against their feelings. A mom is insulted, a woman with a pretty hairstyle is offended, someone with a nice outfit is annoyed. "You look nice ...Read more
Wife's Memory Is Fading Fast
Dear Annie: I think my partner is slipping away from me, and I do not know how to reach for her without breaking both our hearts.
My wife, "Laura," is 68. We have been together for 40 years. She has always been the organized one. When the kids were young, she could tell you where every permission slip, tax form and missing sock lived in our ...Read more
Demands Of Career Have Put A Damper On Dreams
DEAR ABBY: I am in my early 30s and happy in certain aspects of my life: I recently moved to a house and married a man I love very much. I have friends, hobbies and dreams. One of these dreams is to be a novelist, although I do marketing for a tech company right now.
This brings me to my problem: I have been feeling depressed by my job. Working...Read more
Asking Eric: Couple has everything but still makes wedding registry
Dear Eric: A friend is planning his second marriage. It will be his fiancée’s third. Both are in their mid-to-late 60s, have owned their single-family homes for many years, and have reasonably well-paying jobs.
They are planning a wedding shower and have registered for gifts, including expensive kitchen equipment and utensils, china, ...Read more
Breaking Free From My Phone
Dear Annie: I am starting to feel like my whole life is lived through a screen, and I am ashamed to admit how much control my phone seems to have over me.
I am 42 and married, with two kids in middle school. On paper, things are fine. In reality, I spend more time scrolling than actually living my life. I pick up my phone "just to check one ...Read more
Jilted Wife Blames Herself For Marriage's Collapse
DEAR ABBY: My ex-husband and I were best friends. We shared everything -- dreams, laughs and struggles. I was convinced we'd grow old together. When he proposed, I said yes without hesitation. We had plans to start a family, but he asked me to wait until we purchased a home. I waited five years, trusting that the dream we had built together was ...Read more
Asking Eric: Parents kept up relationship with son’s ex after infidelity
Dear Eric: About 14 years ago our son was seriously dating a woman whom both my wife and I really adored. We both thought she would be a great wife and daughter-in-law.
She became the daughter we always wanted to have.
Then the unspeakable happened. She cheated on him. They broke up, yet remained friends, but she claimed she had adopted us as ...Read more
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