Early retirement: threat or menace?

Danny Tyree on Apr 13, 2022

When I teased about early retirement, my wife lovingly presented me with a stack of books. Great! A nostalgic feast of lazily re-reading the complete World Book Encyclopedia! No, wait – it’s a bound collection of “honey do” lists! (“Hey, boss – any prospects for 25-hour workdays this week?”)

Speaking of my wife, I think couples appreciate their “together time” more when most of the week means commuting and laboring. Quality over quantity. Familiarity breeds contempt. There’s a fine line between “Precious and few are the moments we two can share” and “Hit the road, Jack, and don’t you come back no more no more no more…”

I realize I am just kicking the can down the road, but I am not in a hurry to join the “fixed-income rant” brigade. I don’t want to be known for muttering things such as “Back in my day, Fonzie had to ski through five miles of snow before he could jump the shark.” No, sirree, Bob! (Oops. Not okay, Boomer.)

Yes, I’ll keep on keeping my nose to the grindstone. (Hey, free exfoliation!) I have my inspirations. After thousands of years, the Sirens haven’t given up. I just saw one in front of an auto parts store beating up an inflatable dancing tube man for his job.

Ooo! That had to hurt! Hey, I’m suddenly having a flashback to when I got caught raiding the office refrigerator at Concussions R Us. Never saw the fruitcake coming until it was too late!

Danny Tyree welcomes email responses at tyreetyrades@aol.com and visits to his Facebook fan page “Tyree’s Tyrades.”