Are you singing the lunchtime errand blues?

Danny Tyree on Jan 26, 2022

This typically manifests itself in statements such as “Just let me snap a photo and I’ll text you later to critique how natural Bertram looked” or “She’s in a better place, which reminds me I need to get some Royal Caribbean brochures on the way back to the factory” or “At least he’s not suffering anymore, and neither will I be if someone will move the hearse so I can get to the chiropractor.”

I know there’s a temptation to call all this the “rat race,” but the rats don’t need to race. They just waddle over and scarf up all the pizza, doughnut crumbs, etc. that humans drop as we navigate repair shops, charity drop-off sites and library book returns.

Our lifestyle can’t be healthy, unless you think it’s healthy to hear someone exclaim, “Hey, I think all my good gut bacteria wound up in my big toe when I entered the parking lot on two wheels!”

At least if you complete your appointed rounds without experiencing a stroke, you can exult, “I’m tired, but it’s a good tired.”

Unless…

“Wait, I forgot to drop off that school permission slip for my redheaded stepchild! Atomic batteries to power, turbines to speed!”

Danny Tyree welcomes email responses at tyreetyrades@aol.com and visits to his Facebook fan page “Tyree’s Tyrades.”