Is marriage really worth all these risks?

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From the writings of the Rev. Billy Graham

Q: My boyfriend and I are discussing marriage since we don't believe it is right to live together. We hear so much negative about marriage: having to put up with in-laws, money problems, differences in how to raise children, possible divorce if a couple decides they are not compatible. Is marriage really worth all these risks? -- L.T.

A: There are many practical concerns that can cause serious problems in a marriage. Couples face difficulties and challenges during marriage, just as others face problems daily.

Unfortunately, romance often fades after the "I do's." One of the most important questions couples should ask is: Are we ready to set aside our individual desires in order to serve one another and become one? This is something that is seldom thought about today when it comes to the "bonds of holy matrimony."

Marriage was designed by God. He meant for it actually to involve three people: the man, the woman, and God. When God is left out of a marriage, that marriage will always be less than what God intended it to be, even if it seems happy. When God is left out, it means two individuals will often be competing with each other instead of complementing another by loving the other more than themselves and being quick to forgive. When each person is seeking God's will, and when each person is allowing God to take away the selfishness of his or her heart and replace it with sacrificial love, then there will be joy and peace.


This is why the Bible stresses that a marriage ideally should be a picture or reflection of Christ's love for His people. "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her" (Ephesians 5:25). This does not mean there will not be conflicts and problems to work through, but when Christ is the head of a couple's marriage, they will turn to Him for wisdom, reminding each to submit to the other, and He will give both peace and understanding, helping them to resolve whatever they face.


(This column is based on the words and writings of the late Rev. Billy Graham.)




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