Health & Spirit

How do I know my ex isn't just faking finding God?

By Billy Graham, Tribune Content Agency on

Q: I divorced my abusive husband after he got in trouble and ended up in prison, and I told him I never wanted to see him again. Now he claims he's found God, and he says he wants to restart our relationship when he gets out in a few months. How do I know he isn't just faking it? -- L.McS.

A: You are wise to be cautious; not everyone who claims to be a follower of Jesus is actually committed to Him. Eleven of Jesus' closest disciples truly believed in Him, but one -- Judas -- was only interested in himself and later betrayed Jesus.

Don't misunderstand me, however; Christ is able to change even the most stubborn person, and this may well be the case with your ex-husband. Sometimes people have to reach bottom (so to speak) before they'll admit they need God. And when they turn in faith to Christ and open their hearts and lives to Him, He welcomes them and forgives them and begins to change them. Remember: God "is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine" (Ephesians 3:20).

I often think of the Apostle Paul in this regard. He was violently opposed to Christ, and did everything he could to destroy His followers. As a result, when Paul gave his life to Christ, almost no one believed him, and they rejected him. Only later, when they saw that his life truly had changed, did they welcome Him.

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What should you do? Pray for your ex-husband, that he'll get connected with Christians who can help him. Pray too that God will give you wisdom. Don't be talked into any hasty decisions, however; take time to see if he is truly seeking to follow Christ. Jesus said, "By their fruit you will recognize them" (Matthew 7:20).


(Send your queries to "My Answer," c/o Billy Graham, Billy Graham Evangelistic Association, 1 Billy Graham Parkway, Charlotte, N.C., 28201; call 1-(877) 2-GRAHAM, or visit the Web site for the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association:



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