Life Advice



Ask Amy: Mother-in-law wonders what she’s done wrong

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am troubled.

I have been giving – really extending – the benefit of the doubt to “Jan,” my daughter-in-law, for some time.

I see my son and Jan a couple of times a year, when I visit their city.

I get a hotel room willingly and without question. I am friendly and supportive, I compliment her sincerely, and I find positive, non-controversial things to talk about.

She just doesn't seem to like me – or my visits – and it clearly hurts and upsets my son.

She is openly impatient with him and absolutely cold to me.


I can do nothing right. It would be nice if we could be friends, but if that's too much I would be OK with being simply polite.

I am bewildered and hurt for my son.

I know that he is courteous and welcoming to her parents.

I don't know what I have done, if anything.


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