Life Advice



Ask Amy: Husband’s secret Twitter account violates bond

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: My husband of nine years has a secret Twitter account where he's been sexting other people, complete with exchanged pictures and videos.

I confronted him about it, explained that it crossed boundaries I'm not comfortable with, and he promised he'd delete the account.

A few months later, I noticed he'd been avoiding intimacy with me (again) and learned that he was back at it.

I confronted him again and he apologized profusely, promising that he really would stop. But he still hasn't deleted the profile.

I feel betrayed and cheated on.

It turns out that he wasn't just messaging other women, but also men.


I asked him if that was something he wanted to explore. He's been very accepting about my own previous involvement with women (I’m bisexual), but he assured me that wasn't it.

I'm wondering if he's possibly in denial about being bi-curious, due to his conservative family.

I know he wouldn't be comfortable with me doing the same thing, and I have too much self-respect to stand for my boundaries being continually disregarded.

How do I let him know that although I love him unconditionally, I intend to stay firm on my boundaries?


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