Ask Amy: Old friends only connect over kids
– The Termagant
Dear Termagant: Your feelings are justified. Your son has been honest with you regarding his wife’s sensitivities. Some people regard any feedback – even positive feedback – as a critique, when they believe they are only venting. This is immature and frustrating.
I suggest that you communicate directly with your DIL. Tell her judiciously what your son has explained to you, and ask if you two can have a “reset.” Maintain an open attitude, don’t resort to sarcasm, listen intently, and do your very best to understand her feelings, and communicate your own.
Dear Amy: “Reluctant Grandma” didn't want to host a baby shower for her unmarried son and his partner.
Twenty-some years ago my niece was pregnant and unmarried.
Her 13-year-old brother told her, "It's not my job to be mad at you, so I'm just going to be happy for you."
I've thought of that many times over the years when I'm tempted to be judgmental about someone.
– Proud Aunt
Dear Proud: I love this wise expression.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
©2023 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
