Life Advice



Ask Amy: Old friend is too curious about birth mystery

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: My 70-year-old uncle and aunt (also 70) are separated after 33 years of marriage.

He bought her a house a year and a half ago — out of state and near her newly married son who works there, so that she can see him often.

Her two other children are from his first marriage, and he seems to put them over my aunt — being much closer to them than to her.

He does visit his wife a couple times a year and does call her frequently.

He pays for all her expenses, and they occasionally go on short trips together. She still cannot figure out why she can’t come home!

Do you have any suggestions, as she seems very upset with this situation.


– Concerned

Dear Concerned: From your description, it sounds as if your aunt was given the opportunity, and then chose to move away. Did her husband lie to her when presenting her options?

It also sounds as if she doesn’t have any legal closure regarding her newly hybridized marriage-which-isn’t-a-marriage.

While her husband’s financial (and occasional emotional) largesse currently benefits her in some ways, her life would be further upended if he suddenly withdrew it, which he could do.


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