Friendship falters over dangerous liaisons
Your judgments about how your friend is behaving might be prudent and your choice not to involve your young daughter is a sound one, but no one enjoys being judged. She might not miss you as much as you miss her.
You seem to want to educate and influence her in a positive way, but you can't do that if you don't have a relationship.
If you had merely distanced yourself, rather than severing the relationship altogether, you might have had a slender relationship to return to, when (or if) she ever settled down.
Dear Amy: We live in a middle-class suburban neighborhood. Over the years, most of the homes have been improved or at the very least are well maintained.
One house on our block, which is owned by a very nice family who have lived there for many years, has fallen into disrepair and is an eyesore, with conditions that could pose issues for the homeowner, such as a collapsing chimney, gutters filled with debris and plant life, rusted handrails, piles of debris that could house rodents, etc.
The family is young and athletic with high school-age children.
Never knowing someone else's finances, we cannot expect major improvements. But is it too little to expect some pride in ownership? For someone to paint a rusted rail, clean a gutter out, etc.?
How should neighbors concerned about home values and other quality-of-life issues address this?
-- Behind Closed Blinds
Dear Behind: Your town should have rules regarding property upkeep; research any ordinances to see if they are in violation. Your town's website will have a phone number you can call to report this unkempt property. A ticket or the threat of a fine might inspire this family to at least clean up the outside of their home.
...continued
