Grandma might be drinking again
What you can't do is be a one-woman rescue squad, mainly because these enabling family members will undermine and undo your efforts, possibly in very creative ways.
You can ask your mother-in-law: "Jane, I sense that you are drinking and hope you will get help to stop."
You and your husband should attend Al-Anon meetings (al-anon.org). He, especially, will continue to wrestle with conflicted feelings regarding both of his parents' behavior.
Dear Amy: My fiance recently told me that an old college friend sent him a Facebook friend request.
Turns out, the "friend" is a woman -- someone he used to hook up with.
I actually thought it was a great idea for them to reconnect, because as he has aged and lost touch with so many friends (we are in our mid-50s).
A few days later, he told me he had a dream that they were meeting in Florida. I felt this was untruthful, and I secretly checked his text messages only to discover that they have been texting and making plans to meet for dinner.
When I confronted him, he said I'm being paranoid and that this is an innocent dinner between friends who haven't seen each other in 30 years. I'm just not buying it, because he didn't tell me about this contact until confronted.
He has since said that he won't go to the dinner, but I think this is most likely BS too. I work at night and don't have a way to know if he goes or not -- unless I go snooping again.
We are supposed to get married in four months, and I'm semi-freaking out.
...continued
