Ask Amy: DNA discovery leads to awkward reality
Dear Amy: My fiance and I are planning for our destination wedding this summer. We have a small guest list and have made our plans very aware of the costs to our guests and the substantial commitment it takes to attend a destination wedding.
My mother is pretty wonderful and although a destination wedding is not her first choice for us, she is being a good sport. She and my father would prefer that we have a more traditional wedding in our hometown.
Recently, though, my mom started advocating that we should include an old friend of hers who is familiar with our wedding destination and has expressed enthusiasm about attending. I have met this woman (my fiance has not), but I am not keen to invite this extra person. When I told my mother this, she offered to pay for her friend’s trip.
I’m feeling pressured to agree to this.
What do you think we should do?
– Bumbling Bride
Dear Bumbling: First, you should ask your mother why she is so enthusiastic about doing this. She may be responding to pressure from her friend.
And then you and your fiance should consider this (together) and take a hard pass on this whole idea, unless you genuinely want her there, which I don’t think you do.
Dear Amy: I have to disagree with your response to “Only the Messenger,” a hairdresser who saw her client’s husband’s picture on a dating website.
You suggested that she send an anonymous message. Disturbing messages sent anonymously are even more upsetting.
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