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I don't want to keep it a secret, but I am sure a woman will bid me adieu if I tell her this when we are first getting to know each other; however, I don't want to wait too long to tell her.

Amy, at what point in a relationship should I share my secret?

-- Closeted

Dear Closeted: It would help if you started to see your cross-dressing not as a secret, but as something elemental that is simply part of you.

Your preference doesn't present a health risk to a partner, so you don't have to disclose this before sexual intimacy. You should not lead with it too early, mainly because if a potential partner has no other information about you, she won't be able to put this into context.

You should disclose this intimate aspect of you when you find yourself falling for someone. Don't present it as a deal breaker, but as a piece of intimate information you want a partner to know. Some women will be turned off by it, but others will be open to it.

Dear Amy: "Two Decades of Guilt" described being sexually assaulted by two men when she was a teenager.

This happened to me. I was assaulted by a state worker while taking my driver's test when I was a teenager. He instructed me to drive to a fairly secluded place, where he assaulted me. I was so shaken; I told my boyfriend immediately and he reported it to the director. No one believed us, because this man was a "family man."

I later heard that he had done this to other teenagers. This was 50 years ago. I wish I had gone to the police. I saw his obituary in the newspaper and it turned my stomach.

-- Guilty

Dear Guilty: This is an appalling abuse of power. Fifty years ago, turning him in might have damaged you further, as victims were sometimes blamed for their own assault.

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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Amy Dickinson, c/o Tribune Content Agency, LLC., 16650 Westgrove Dr., Suite 175, Addison, TX 75001. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)