In-law feels cut from the herd
DEAR AMY: I was invited to three nephews' "destination weddings" in one summer. I am an older widow and find it difficult financially and logistically to travel solo. I suggest more understanding be given to elder invitees to these extravagant weddings; the events are becoming "a bit much" (and all for show?)! -- Old Auntie
DEAR AUNTIE: Psst ... come and sit by me. I have an unsavory little tidbit to share about destination weddings.
There is a high likelihood that these invitations are "for show," and that your dear nephews didn't expect -- or even want -- you to come to their weddings.
If they wanted to host a wedding that was family-centered and inclusive, they would have hosted it at a venue where people would find it easier (and less expensive) to attend.
DEAR AMY: Regarding "Upset Parents," whose adult children seemed always to find fault with them, they should respond by letting their kids know that when they are footing the bill, they can weigh in on tipping, driving, etc.
My father's favorite phrase (he's a pilot) is, "If you're buying, I'm flying."
It worked great on me, and as an air traffic controller I use it on my kids now too. It gets the point across humorously and, really, anyone could use it. -- Midwest Controller
DEAR CONTROLLER: I've used this phrase many times myself. Well done and thank you.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook. Amy Dickinson's memoir, "The Mighty Queens of Freeville: A Mother, a Daughter and the Town that Raised Them" (Hyperion), is available in bookstores.)
