Should girlfriend make a big move for her guy?
DEAR AMY: We have a very good friend, "Stacy," whom we've known for years. Lately we find that, instead of doing things with her friends, Stacy seems to hole up at her house, never answering the phone. The voicemail box on her cellphone is full so we can't leave a message and she takes a week to respond to texts or emails.
When we see her she's happy but we can't figure out what she's doing with her time and why she's chronically late to every engagement (though she denies that).
She has also turned rather miserly, even though she doesn't have money problems.
It may sound trivial but we're concerned about her and when we try to broach the subject, she gets very defensive. Any ideas for us? -- Worried Friends
DEAR FRIENDS: Some of your observations are tinged by the sort of judgment that can make a friend wary -- or defensive. "Stacy" might be struggling with depression, alcoholism (the holing-up and chronic lateness are signs for either, or both), or another emotional or health challenge. If she seems to have substantially changed recently, tell her, "I worry about you. I treasure our time together, so I hope you'll be honest with me. Is everything OK?"
DEAR AMY: As we learn in our community of yet another death associated with teenage drinking, I want to applaud your tough answer to "Distraught Mom," whose 15-year-old daughter wanted to attend "keggers."
Kids that age are not mature enough to make this sort of choice. That's why parents need to say, "No!" -- Grateful and Grieving
DEAR GRIEVING: Many parents contacted me with similar feedback. Thank you all.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook. Amy Dickinson's memoir, "The Mighty Queens of Freeville: A Mother, a Daughter and the Town that Raised Them" (Hyperion), is available in bookstores.)
