Wife's secret chats lead husband to worry
After one week, she's informed me that she is romantically communicating with her ex again via text. He is married with three children and happens to live in this new city where she has moved. While she knows that I don't approve of the relationship because it will never lead to a happy and fulfilling life for her, I understand that she has moved to a new city with no other girlfriends to talk to and bounce things off of.
Do I just patiently listen to her romantic tales while I know this is just one more round on the emotional carousel, or should I be honest and tell her these conversations make me feel bad and they're exhausting? It kills me to see her doing this again. She could do so much better. -- Disenchanted Optimist
DEAR DISENCHANTED: You've already been patient. Now be honest. Honest is: "I'm sorry you are choosing to hop back onto this emotional roller coaster with a married man. I feel sad about it because you're making a choice that could hurt a lot of people -- especially you."
Unfortunately, she will not start a new life if she is locked into her old choices. Otherwise only her address has changed.
DEAR AMY: The letter from "College Girl" brought a smile to my face. She got upset when her boyfriend didn't return her texts quickly.
Times and expectations have really changed. When I wrote letters to my boyfriend in the Navy when he was in Vietnam, I could expect a response in two to four weeks -- maybe -- even though he wrote a letter every day! -- Still Married after 46 Years
DEAR STILL MARRIED: Sometimes slow is best. I still write letters.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook. Amy Dickinson's memoir, "The Mighty Queens of Freeville: A Mother, a Daughter and the Town that Raised Them" (Hyperion), is available in bookstores.)
