Woman confused by man's attempt to court her
But this might not be generational. Your guy may just be deliberate and slower-moving. He may also be nervous about you and worried about how you might respond to being sexually intimate.
He could also be gay, asexual, self-conscious about his appendectomy scar, or committed to a chastity pledge.
So -- it's time to talk about it. You can force this issue by putting the moves on him and decoding his response, or -- probably better for both of you -- you can initiate a conversation about sex, intimacy, and your dating relationship.
DEAR AMY: I've landed a great job, working in a tourist information cabin next to a beautiful lake surrounded by mountains. I love it. The one problem is "Bob." He drives the tourist-shuttle bus daily. He drives for an hour and then hangs out for an hour, back and forth all day.
He'll return from a trip, then come into the office and if there are no tourists seeking assistance, he'll just start griping about the customers; then he complains about the weather, the economy, politics, on and on. He'll only stop when tourists come in or he has to leave to drive the bus.
It really brings my mood down. I appreciate quiet times, I can read or write letters (no computer access there) or just peacefully enjoy the scenic views.
I once said something to my boss about Bob, hoping my boss would do something about it. But he just chuckled and said, "Yeah, that sounds like Bob."
I'm a captive audience. What would you suggest I say to him? -- Tour Guide Needing Guidance
DEAR TOUR GUIDE: Your boss should not be refereeing your relationship with an annoying co-worker. That's your job. Say to him, "'Bob, I'm going to spend this break reading my book; I can't listen right now."
Generally, he will talk less if you don't engage. Don't respond or nod your head. Like the winds through the mountains, he may need to blow a little before he settles down.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@tribpub.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook. Amy Dickinson's memoir, "The Mighty Queens of Freeville: A Mother, a Daughter and the Town that Raised Them" (Hyperion), is available in bookstores.)
