Philosophizer/point guard Kyrie Irving met with the media for the first time since joining the Dallas Mavericks, and after listening to him talk for 15 minutes the next team he will sign with are the Tibetan Fighting Monks.

At a minimum Kyrie with the Mavericks will be a must watch, not really for his skills as a basketball player but rather the conviction of his beliefs and rhetoric.

The depth of his sincerity about the nonsense that comes out of his mouth is Presidential.

However many school hours Kyrie actually earned in his one season at Duke, the school should immediately rescind those credits. The man makes Aaron Rodgers sound like Andy Dalton.

It’s not hard to envision a scene in 2033 when Kyrie Irving is standing on a street corner, microphone in hand, yelling about the how the government is orchestrating the end of the world, and that we are all bit players in The Matrix.

The Mavericks are not going to win the 2023 NBA title, but they will win The Most Interesting Team to Watch championship, because Kyrie Irving is crazeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

So crazy he’s smarter than every other organism in the universe.

So crazy that the man who was born in Australia and raised in New Jersey could be a Texan.

Kyrie as a Dallas Maverick could actually work; not only will the media coverage around here be a fraction of what he faced in New York, Kyrie is a natural fit among the natives, and converts who weren’t born here but got here as quickly as we could.

Kyrie, welcome to Texas. You have no idea just how much you will fit in here.

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