Humor

/

Entertainment

Pedro Pascal Barely Remembers Getting The Role For The Last of Us | Drive Away Dolls | Graham Norton

Humor / Jokes /

While we haven't had Margaret Qualley, Geraldine Viswanathan or Beanie Feldstein (yet), we can still celebrate the release of Drive Away Dolls with Colman Domingo, Matt Damon & Pedro Pascal!

Thank You Notes: St. Patrick's Day, Congress Trying to Ban TikTok | The Tonight Show

Humor / Jokes /

Jimmy pens his Thank You Notes to speedometers, stand-up desks and other things.

Oprah Winfrey on Weight Loss Journey, Celebrating Her 70th & Which Rumors About Her are True

Humor / Jokes /

Oprah talks about being very excited to be on the show, sitting on the tarmac in South Africa after forgetting her passport, Jimmy carrying a photo of her around in case of emergency, being in front of a studio audience, her new special on ABC "An Oprah Special: Shame, Blame and the Weight Loss Revolution," what motivated her to cover the ...Read more

Thomas Dambo's magical troll art

Humor / Jokes /

The Danish recycle artist Thomas Dambo uses reclaimed wood and scraps from landfills to create giant works of art depicting trolls – magical creatures that he has installed in 17 countries. Correspondent Lee Cowan talks with Dambo about his creation depicting Oscar the Bird King, hidden in the woods of Vashon Island near Seattle, and how his ...Read more

Miami Cracks Down on Spring Breakers, Ft. Lauderdale PD Sees An Opportunity | The Daily Show

Humor / Jokes /

Where are college kids heading to now that Miami is shutting down spring break? Michael Kosta and Desi Lydic report on the hottest new Florida travel destination: Fort Lauderdale, where things are getting so wild, kids are considering careers in law enforcement.

Meanwhile… Dolly x Beyoncé | Titanic II May Set Sail | Feeding Baby Foxes | Is LaGuardia The Best?

Humor / Jokes /

Meanwhile… Dolly Parton leaked some news about Beyoncé’s country album, an Australian billionaire wants to build a new Titanic, animal rescue specialists have an adorable method for feeding baby foxes in captivity, and the new LaGuardia airport is a hit with passengers.

For The Kids...

Humor / Jokes /

Mother: Why did you just swallow the money I gave you?
Son: Well you did say it was my lunch money!

What's a mushroom?
The place they store the school food!

Teacher: I said to draw a cow eating some grass but you've only drawn the cow?
Pupil: Yes, the cow ate all the grass!

My teacher reminds me of history
She's always ...Read more

Laryngitis

Humor / Jokes /

A man tells his doctor that his wife has laryngitis. The doctor said there was nothing he could do to cure it.

The man said, "Cure it? I want to prolong it."

College Majors

Humor / Jokes /

A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the subject of marriage counseling came up. "Oh, we'll never need that. My husband and I have a great relationship," the wife explained.

"He was a communications major in college and I majored in theater arts. He communicates real well and I just act like I'm listening."

Hut-2-3-4....

Humor / Jokes /

As he was drilling a batch of recruits, the sergeant saw that one of them was marching out of step. Walking up next to the man as they marched, he said sarcastically: "Do you know they are all out of step except you?"

"What?" asked the recruit innocently.

"I said -- they are all out of step except you!" thundered the sergeant.

The recruit ...Read more

Bachelor Wisdom

Humor / Jokes /

Bachelor cooking is a matter of attitude. If you think of it as setting fire to things and making a mess, it's fun. However, it's not so great if you think of it as dinner...

Nomenclature is an important part of bachelor cooking. If you call it "Italian cheese toast," it's not disgusting to have warmed-over pizza for breakfast.

Big ethical dilemma

Humor / Jokes /

Upon seeing an elderly lady for the drafting of her will, the attorney charged her $100.

She gave him a $100 bill, not noticing that it was stuck to another $100 bill.

On seeing the two bills stuck together, the ethical question came to the attorney's mind: "Do I tell my partner?"

For The Kids...

Humor / Jokes /

Why shouldn't you take an elephant to the zoo?
Because he'd rather go to the movies!

What's blue and has big ears?
An elephant at the North Pole!

What's grey and lights up?
An electric elephant!

What's big and grey and protects you from the rain?
An umbrellaphant!

What do you do with a green elephant?
Wait till...Read more

A Walk by The Sea

Humor / Jokes /

A young boy and his doting grandmother were walking along the sea shore when a huge wave appeared out of nowhere, sweeping the child out to sea. The horrified woman fell to her knees, raised her eyes to the heavens and begged the Lord to return her beloved grandson.

And, another wave reared up and deposited the stunned child on the sand. The ...Read more

High Blood Pressure

Humor / Jokes /

When a physician remarked on a new patient's extraordinarily ruddy complexion, he said, "High blood pressure, Doc. It comes from my family."

"Your mother's side or your father's?" I asked.

"Neither," he replied. "It's from my wife's family."

"Oh, come now," I said. "How could your wife's family give you high blood pressure?"

He sighed. "You ...Read more

Most Wanted

Humor / Jokes /

A man walks into the sheriff's office... "I want to become a deputy!"

"Good, I want to you to catch this man" says the sheriff handling the man a wanted poster.

The poster reads : 'Last seen wearing a brown paper hat, brown paper shirt, brown paper pants, and brown paper boots.'

"What's he wanted for?" asked the hopeful yound man.

"Rustling."

Give it Up

Humor / Jokes /

Three blokes are driving around, drinking beers and having a laugh when the driver looks in the mirror and sees the flashing lights of a police car telling him to pull over. The other two are really worried. "What are we going to do with our beers? We're in trouble!"

"No," the driver says, "it's OK, just pull the label off your bottle and stick...Read more

The Life of a Cat

Humor / Jokes /

Day 283 Of My Captivity.

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.

...Read more

A Math Limerick

Humor / Jokes /

There was a young fellow from Trinity
Who took the square root of infinity
But the number of digits
Gave him the fidgets
He dropped math and took up divinity

Heisenberg's Traffic Stop

Humor / Jokes /

Heisenberg is out for a drive when he's stopped by a traffic cop. The cop says 'Do you know how fast you were going?' Heisenberg says 'No, but I know where I am.'

 

Comics

RJ Matson Andy Capp Cul de Sac Adam Zyglis Jimmy Margulies Jerry King Cartoons