Circumstances change — people pair off, have children, choose lives that seem at odds with the dreams of youth.

In "Merrily," Frank is positioned as the "villain" of the piece — in his pursuit of fame, and money, he has betrayed two marriages as well as neglecting the central friendship. But Charley's insistence that he remain the same young man he met when they were both poor and struggling, and Mary's increasingly desperate need for the friendship to endure no matter what, is just as problematic.

More than just about anything, love of any kind requires much forgiveness and not all "truth-telling" is about telling the truth.

The expectation that friendship can always, and magically, transcend everything, that we will always be cushioned by a group of forever friends, can create as much anxiety as friendship is supposed to relieve.

Sometimes friendships break or simply fade. Not all bonds survive the test of time or change, and even the best friendships can go through fallow periods. People don't have to live in each other's pockets to avoid being alone, and being alone is not always a bad thing.

Friends are glorious creatures, people we love without the formal commitments of family or marriage but because we just do. There is no formula for enduring friendship beyond the desire and willingness to keep it alive and healthy. Like any type of love, you just know it when you feel it. And when you keep on feeling it.

No matter what.

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(Mary McNamara is a culture columnist and critic for the Los Angeles Times.)

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