Politics, Moderate



200,000 US coronavirus deaths will be Trump’s legacy, and his cynical lies should be his end

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

The U.S. death toll from the coronavirus reached 200,000 Tuesday.

That staggeringly grim count came less than a day after President Donald Trump, rambling like a clueless loon before a crowd of largely maskless Ohioans, said the coronavirus “affects virtually nobody” under 18.

It was more deceptive, idiotic nonsense from the man who is ...Read more

Trump’s coronavirus vaccine is coming … in two weeks! And it will make you more patriotic.

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

Hello, fellow patriots. My name is Rex Huppke and I’m a proud member of President Donald Trump’s Council On Patriotism-Inducing Coronavirus Vaccines That Will Be Ready In Two Weeks.

We here at the Council On Patriotism-Inducing Coronavirus Vaccines That Will Be Ready In Two Weeks have a surprise announcement: President Trump will soon ...Read more

Republicans adopt ‘herd mentality’ to Trump’s dangerous rigged-election rhetoric by staying silent

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

As President Donald Trump continues to recklessly paint mail-in ballots as nefarious liberal creations, as he tweets and squawks nonsensically about a “rigged election,” there is silence from Republican lawmakers.

They remain quiet as jellyfish, unable to muster a single vertebra let alone a collective spine, while a sitting president ...Read more

Always-calm Trump lied about coronavirus but patriotically made sure no Americans died of panic

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

I can tell you this: If there’s one thing President Donald Trump does not want to do, it’s create a panic.

Tweet from Trump, Sept. 10, 2020: “If I don’t win, America’s Suburbs will be OVERRUN with Low Income Projects, Anarchists, Agitators, Looters and, of course, ‘Friendly Protesters’.”

Many Americans are outraged ...Read more

Barr’s Justice Department rides to Trump’s defense in case involving rape claim. Your tax dollars at work!

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

Great news, fellow Americans. Our tax dollars may now be used to help defend President Donald Trump in a defamation lawsuit brought by a woman who claims Trump raped her!

I don’t know about you all, but when I think about how I want the government to use my money, the first thing that comes to mind is: Keep America safe. But the second thing ...Read more

Video of police suffocating Daniel Prude is horrifying, but Americans need to watch it

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

Video from police body cameras shows Daniel Prude, a 41-year-old Black man from Chicago, being suffocated by police officers on a street in Rochester, New York, on a cold, early morning in March. Prude died seven days later after his family had him removed from life support.

You need to watch that video.

Prude’s death happened two months ...Read more

Trump defends Kenosha shooter charged with homicide as Biden decries violence ‘on the left or the right’

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

After weeks of patently false claims that Joe Biden hasn’t condemned violence and looting stemming from protests across the country, President Donald Trump on Monday refused to condemn the 17-year-old Illinoisan charged with shooting and killing two protesters in Kenosha.

“We’re looking at all of it,” Trump said. “That was an ...Read more

Trump’s narcissism seems effective. So I am now the greatest columnist in the world.

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

Regular readers of this column know that, from time to time, I receive emails that are not entirely flattering.

They generally involve helpful critiques like: “You (expletive) suck”; “Your a (expletive) idiot”; or “You stupid (expletive) (expletive), every (expletive) word you write is (expletive), go (expletive) yourself in the (...Read more

Bannon’s arrest on fraud charges shows Trump’s world is an endless con

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

Steve Bannon, President Donald Trump’s former chief strategist, has always looked and sounded to me like someone who should be arrested for fleecing rubes.

On Thursday, his destiny was realized.

Bannon became the latest person in Trump’s orbit to get arrested, charged along with three other Trump enthusiasts and accused of defrauding “...Read more

Trump will NOT hurt the Postal Service or get help from Russia — as long as we let him win the election

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

Hello, I am with the Republican Party and would like to reassure all real (Trump-supporting) Americans that the U.S. Postal Service is just fine and you have no reason to worry about the security of the upcoming election.

As I reassure you that our mail system is not being tampered with in any way, I hope you’ll excuse the noise in the ...Read more

Trump should dump Mike Pence, replace him with a yacht

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

Presumptive Democratic nominee Joe Biden’s decision to choose Sen. Kamala Harris as his running mate leaves President Donald “Scared” Trump with little choice — he needs to dump Vice President Mike Pence.

I know, it’s a shame for both Trump and Pence. The two seemed like a match made in a strange and wildly inaccurate version of ...Read more

Trump’s right, schools must reopen. We just need kids to promise they won’t get the coronavirus.

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

As President Donald Trump has said, we must reopen America’s schools, and it can be done with 100 percent safety as long as children promise to patriotically not get the coronavirus.

I’ll explain how that’s done in a moment, but first, let’s look at the facts.

If we want our country to get back to normal and our children to learn the ...Read more

I am blood-boiling angry that we can’t find the wherewithal to make Chicago's violence stop

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

Janari Ricks was a smart kid. He would’ve been a fourth grader this fall. Good at math. Loved sports. Full of energy.

The kind of kid you’d love to meet.

Same with Caleb Reed, a 17-year-old gun violence activist, a student at Mather High School. Passionate. Outspoken. Confident beyond his years.

But you won’t meet Caleb. Or Janari. Or 7...Read more

Trump is right — Joe Biden will abolish the suburbs. And NO ONE will be safe!

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

President Donald Trump is right — Joe Biden, a known supporter of evil and Marxism and America-hating, wants to abolish the suburbs.

But it’s worse than that. The Democratic presidential candidate and former vice president doesn’t just seek to abolish, he wants to bulldoze, befoul and hold pagan rituals on the ashes of the suburbs. He ...Read more

Not wearing a mask is as dumb as not wearing a condom — in the coronavirus age, practice safe living

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

To the mask-wearing and socially distanced few, the ones dutifully doing their part to slow the spread of the coronavirus here in Chicago and across the country, this is for you.

Share it with the mask-less. Hand it to the stubborn, the uninformed and those who think they’re invincible. Give it to the liberty fetishists who believe the world ...Read more

Trump demands schools reopen or funds might be cut — our (expendable) kids must face the virus!

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

All right, you little whippersnappers, listen up. I’ve had it with all the whining and griping about the “coronavirus pandemic” and the “debate over whether to open schools in the fall” and all that lily-livered blah-blah.

You brats are going to listen to me and to your president, Donald J. Trump, and you’re going to march your ...Read more

We don’t deserve dogs, yet they accept and adore us

Politics, Moderate / Rex Huppke /

If I had to choose between spending time with one good dog or five good people, I’d pick the dog every day of the week and twice on Sundays.

That may sound anti-social, but it’s a pragmatic choice, driven by data.

People, even the good ones, have more flaws than dogs. People, even the good ones, struggle to love without conditions. And ...Read more



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