ArcaMax

I am a member of the last generation of American children who were no big deal. No one made a big deal over me, ever. Not my mother, my father, or anyone else. For my parents, raising me properly was a big deal, but I was not. It may come as a shock and surprise to some readers, but the process and the person are two different things.

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Question: I get very frustrated with my children when they don’t obey me, even down to the simplest of instructions, and end up yelling. How does a parent stop yelling at her kids?

Answer: Thank you, thank you, thank you for asking this very pertinent and timely question. Yelling is commonplace among today’s parents (as ...Read more

Responding to my recent columns on video games and smart phones, a reader asks what the problem is, thus proving that these devices can and do cause serious harm to one’s cognitive hardware. He, the father of two boys and a gamer himself, in effect claims that parents are imagining things and researchers are not finding what they are finding. ...Read more

Question: I have taught my 4-year-old son that he is the boss. I have given him too many choices and too many explanations. I’ve allowed him to manipulate, disobey, and disrespect me. Ever since I began devouring your podcasts and newspaper columns, however, my eyes have been opened. It’s been a few weeks since I started putting your ...Read more

Question: Our son attends first grade at the local public school. At the beginning of the school year, all the parents were basically told that we are expected to go to the school’s parent website every day to keep up with our kids’ homework assignments. In addition, the “Parent Portal,” as it’s called, also lets us know what we...Read more

Question: A few months after he got his driver’s license, we found a bag of marijuana in our 16-year-old son’s car. He swore it wasn’t his and that he didn’t know whose it was and that he’s never used pot, but then he failed to pass a drug test. Now he admits that he’s smoked pot, but he says he only tried it once and didn’t...Read more

When I was a child, a popular comic strip was There Oughta Be a Law. It ran in the paper that came to our doorstep every morning and was one of the first things I went to when it was my turn to get ink all over my fingers. I later realized that at one level the cartoonist was satirizing people who hold to great faith in the ability of government...Read more

Question: Our twin girls will be three in a few months. Our pediatrician recommended that we start toilet training at 32 months, which we did. After several months and lots of gnashing of teeth, one of the girls finally got it. The other one, however, seems completely oblivious to our efforts. This has become very frustrating for us and ...Read more

Have you ever heard of an addict who was cured of his or her addiction because someone limited, but did not eliminate, their access to the substance or behavior in question? No, you have not. Is an addiction to gambling less harmful if the addict is only allowed to gamble five hours a week? No, it is not. The proposition is absurd.

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Question: We’ve just been informed that our 7-year-old son has been effectively “expelled” from the private school he attended last year because of repeated instances of stealing small items from classmates and, on one occasion, from the teacher’s desk. We’re rather shocked because our son was the highest-performing student in ...Read more

I call it “Vitamin N.” It is the word children need to hear most, but it is currently the word children hear least. It is arguably the most character-building word in the English language, but then helping children achieve great things (or creating the illusion that they are achieving great things) has eclipsed helping children build strong ...Read more

Do you need a parent-nanny? Not a nanny for your child, mind you, but one for YOU!

I recently introduced my readers to what I call “upside-down, inside-out and turned around backwards parent-view disorder” (the column in question is currently posted on johnrosemond.com). The symptoms of this ubiquitous malady include pervasive ...Read more

For several reasons, I am not a fan of parenting magazines. First, they reinforce the impression that child-rearing is a very complicated affair, requiring consulting with “experts” on a regular basis (and yes, I am fully aware of the irony of that statement). Second, with every issue, said publications raise the Good Mommy Bar by giving ...Read more

I was honored to be a guest on my good friend Dennis Prager’s syndicated radio program the other day and as anyone who is familiar with my point-of-view on parenting matters will appreciate, much of the conversation centered on the need for children to obey.

Children should obey, I maintain, because—and solid research confirms common sense...Read more

Many of today’s parents suffer (and suffer they do, albeit a good number seem to feel their suffering is a sign of conscientious parenting) from what I call “upside-down, inside-out and backwards parent-view disorder.”

First, an explanation of the term “parent-view.” Just as one’s worldview consists of beliefs concerning the meaning...Read more

Question: Our 4-year-old prefers solitary play over play with other children. It’s been this way from early on when I began arranging play dates for him. When those really didn’t work, I enrolled him in pre-school but that didn’t help either. If firmly instructed to do so, he will join in and “play” with other children. I put ...Read more

Question: We have just moved and are seeking a new school for our two children – 6- and 8-year-old boys. They are smart, respectful of adults, and creative. We know that sounds like typical bragging, but it is what our friends and their teachers have all told us. We raise them in as traditional a manner as we can, given the opposing ...Read more