What Guys Will Put Up With for Great Sex
Six months after Tommy met Lexie, she talked him into letting her move in with him. After an additional six months, she talked him into marrying her. "There were no red flags other than her eagerness to move the relationship along with the threat of her ending it if I were to stall. So I let it happen because I was otherwise enjoying her company and the wonderful physical relationship."
In other words, the sex was great, and he didn't want to risk losing it.
Soon after they got married, Tommy says, everything began to change. "My wife had a terrible case of extreme unwarranted jealousy." Lexie's previous husband had frequently cheated on her. She acted as if Tommy was about to start cheating on her, too. "I'm not a cheater. I've never felt I needed any woman other than my wife. I'm very loyal and not sexually interested in other beautiful women."
Lexie was so afraid that Tommy would cheat that she wouldn't let him have any money, just enough to pay for lunch. "She was afraid I might buy a prostitute, something I would never, ever do. She covered my eyes in the movies when there were scenes with scantily clad or naked women. She even tore pictures of attractive women from magazines and newspapers. She refused to let me watch certain television programs for the same reason.
"If a female called on the phone, even if it was for work or just a telemarketer, I was accused of cheating. If it was someone from work, I often had to call the woman back and do an embarrassing follow-up to convince Lexie it was about work."
Lexie wasn't always convinced. When she wasn't, she would "punish" Tommy. "She would keep me awake all night long, something she could manage to do herself but was absolute torture for me."
Tommy moved out. Lexie would call at 3 a.m. and hang up. He called the police and told them she was harassing him. "I chose to have her warned, not prosecuted, and although the calls initially stopped, they continued occasionally."
Lexie began stalking Tommy and playing potentially dangerous tricks on him. "She made an appointment for me with a hair replacement business, figuring it would embarrass and hurt me. She even called my place of work and said her daughter attended the school where I worked and I had molested the girl. She didn't leave her name. Her actions threatened my livelihood."
Through it all, Tommy would receive love letters from Lexie. "Valentine-like cards, some of them 2 feet tall including 45 rpm records of songs we loved together, with notes expressing her love for me and telling me how much she wanted me back. It was like 'Fatal Attraction.'"
It took Tommy a full year to get rid of Lexie. She continued her dirty tricks till the very end.
Tommy has dated some since the divorce and says most women believe men are guilty till proven innocent based on their past experiences.
"For instance, one woman's ex was a compulsive gambler, and they wound up in bankruptcy. After one trip to an off-track betting, I was treated as if I were a compulsive gambler, too. I'm done trying to find a woman, although I'm willing to let the right one find me."
Have your experiences soured you on men or women? Send your tale, along with your questions, problems and rants to email@example.com. And check out my e-books, "Dear Cheryl: Advice from Tales from the Front" and "I'll Call You. Not."