Life Advice

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Health & Spirit

Should I change my locks after an acrimonious breakup?

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

I am in the midst of an acrimonious breakup after a 13-year relationship, but not marriage. He is living in his new apartment, but he has not moved out -- he still has keys to our/my house, which I owned prior to our relationship. I'm working with a lawyer, who has advised me ...Read more

My daughter's ex confronted her about a photo taken with her new boyfriend

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

My daughter recently ended a five-year relationship with no marriage involved. She has moved on and now has a boyfriend. My daughter, her boyfriend, other family members and I attended a graduation ceremony. While sitting in a gymnasium waiting for the ceremony to start, my daughter pointed out that her ex had a co-worker ...Read more

My spouse and our 6-year-old child do not get along

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Hi Carolyn:

My spouse and our 6-year-old do not get along at all. Much of their time together turns into the 6-year-old screaming and spouse withdrawing because they can't stand being yelled at. I feel stuck in the middle. Is there a way I can help?

-- In the Middle

Yes, by getting ...Read more

My firstborn child was born in vitro. Do I have to reveal this?

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

Time and time again, I read in advice columns that adoptive/egg donor/in vitro children should be made aware early of their origins. We had trouble conceiving our first and utilized medical assistance to conceive. The pregnancy evidently fixed the underlying issue, as all others ...Read more

I'm not comfortable with my mom wanting me to lie to my grandfather

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

My grandfather is in his 90s. He's in great health overall, is mentally very sharp, and lives very close to family. My mother has taken to lying to him when she has something planned that my grandfather will not be participating in -- a family portrait, for example, or a vacation, at least up until the point that we leave -- ...Read more

Should I tell my sister she should find a better job?

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Hi, Carolyn:

My sister has been selling for a multi-level marketing company for a few years now. It seems to be slightly better than some of them -- she "only" has to buy her samples out-of-pocket, not her entire stock. I have learned to skim the Facebook calls to try this or buy that, and ...Read more

How to handle a visiting brother-in-law's bad habits

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

My husband's brother has left after another visit and I would appreciate tips on how to tell him, when he asks to visit again, that we love him but he's not welcome back unless some things change drastically.

He never visited us until we moved to a cool city with lots to do. Now he's come twice, and we don't want a third. He's...Read more

My sis leans on me too much to help with her two kids

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Hi, Carolyn:

I'm 30 and live at home with my disabled mother and grandmother, and my younger sister and her two sons moved in with us last year. I love my nephews (1 and 3), but for the past year I've felt like a second parent, or at worst an unpaid nanny. Sister doesn't work, but she's taking...Read more

Should I tell my fiancé I don't want a baby -- as soon as he does?

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

I'm getting married this summer to the man of my dreams and things have been great. We've got a new house, I'm graduating college next May and we're really happy.

He wants a baby really bad. We agreed to wait until I graduate to start our family, but he confessed to me he really wants to have one sooner. I'm not even sure I ...Read more

Not many know my son died, and now I need help in handling comments about being child-free

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

I am a 45-year-old man. In my early 20s I had a wife and son who were killed in a car accident. My second wife and I have now been married for 15 years and we do not want children.

Many of my wife's relatives don't know my past, and a lot of my current friends, neighbors, co-...Read more

I don't like my girlfriend spanking her son

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

My longtime girlfriend is a single mom. I have a very good relationship with her son.

She spanks him, and I don't believe in spanking. I talked to her about it a lot, we argued some, and then finally several months ago she told me she was going to stop. As far as I knew, she did...Read more

My husband thinks it's not "his problem" to help stressed-out sister with parents

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

My husband, "John," is the oldest of three children. His siblings, "Bill" and "Sue," both live where they all were raised. Both parents are in declining health. Over the years, Sue has taken on the lion's share of caring for them. She is a nurse, so a logical person to tend to medical issues, and now works in a high-pressure ...Read more

Should I agree to revive friendship with manipulative man or just walk away?

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn Hax is away. The following first appeared March 11 and 20, 2005.

Dear Carolyn:

I fell in love with a very close friend, although he was not interested in dating. I chose to continue the friendship and eventually fell out of love with him, then became aware that while I was in love with him I was overlooking many critical ...Read more

I'm afraid my husband and I won't be able to provide for our unborn child

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn Hax is away. The following first appeared Feb. 13, 2005.

Dear Carolyn:

I just found out I'm pregnant. I am psyched for all the obvious reasons, but also dismayed with myself. I'd planned to do so much more before becoming a mom. I had always promised myself that I'd make a lot of money so I could give a child everything; that...Read more

Not feeling ecstatic about my upcoming wedding

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn Hax is away. The following first appeared Feb. 9 and 23, 2005.

Dear Carolyn:

"Jared" and I are recently engaged; however, we live in different states. Everyone is ecstatic about the upcoming wedding -- except me. I love Jared but I think my feelings are based on other people's opinion of us.

If everyone loves him and loves ...Read more

I regret telling my ex's wife about his feelings for me

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn Hax is away. The following first appeared Jan. 14, 2005.

Dear Carolyn:

My husband and I divorced bitterly 10 years ago. Last year he made remarks and did things that let me (and others) know he still has feelings for me. This was done even though he remarried and has a baby on the way. It was common knowledge that he married ...Read more

I warned my boyfriend I was a slob, but now he complains about the chaos

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn Hax is away. The following first appeared Jan. 9 and 23, 2005.

Dear Carolyn:

My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 1/2 years, living together for one. He is super-super neat and clean, and I am, admittedly, a slob. He knew all of this before we moved in together, said he didn't mind in the least. I made sure to confirm ...Read more

I don't like my sister's choice of name for her unborn baby

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn Hax is away. The following first appeared Feb. 2, 18 and 20, 2005.

Dear Carolyn:

My sister is pregnant for the first time, and I'm excited to become an uncle. The issue: The names she has picked out are so soap opera-esque that I want to ask how she could name her kid that. Any advice?

-- Va.

Buy her a few of those ...Read more

Should I ask my new boyfriend where our relationship is going?

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn Hax is away. The following first appeared Jan. 2, Jan. 5 and Feb. 27, 2005.

Dear Carolyn:

I have finally met a guy I really like. We have been seeing each other on and off for a couple of months. Should I ask where this relationship is going or just see where it takes us? I have been raised to believe the guy should bring up ...Read more

How to deal with a resentful husband because he doesn't get attention

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

I have a job that a lot of people find interesting; it involves travel and working with celebrities. My husband, on the other hand, works in a field that's important but highly technical. I've seen people's eyes glaze over when he tries to describe it.

Social gatherings have ...Read more

 

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