Life Advice



Annie's Mailbox: Heartsick Mother

Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar on

Dear Annie: My 32-year-old daughter, "Carla," has never had a date or a boyfriend, although she has had lots of crushes that have never been returned. I suspect it's because she is very overweight (about 100 pounds), and this has been a bone of contention in our relationship since childhood. I have learned not to talk about it since it negatively affects our mother/daughter relationship.

Carla is bright, pretty and works in a professional world that stresses looks and weight. She now really likes a man who is friendly but has not asked her out. She seems not to realize that her weight affects how men see her.

I really ache for my daughter and want her to find happiness, but what can I do? I have addressed issues of healthy eating (which she seems to do), but she never exercises for any period of time. It makes me heartsick to see that she has so much going for her, lots of friends, etc., but no man in her life, and she obviously wants one. I don't know where to turn. -- Heartsick Mother

Dear Mother: We commend you for not saying anything more about Carla's weight, especially since it is obviously difficult for you to keep quiet. Plenty of plus-size women find men, although it's true that heavier women have a harder time. Carla can discuss her weight problem with her doctor, if she so chooses.

No woman should feel that her life is worthless if there is no man in it. Plenty of single women are happy and fulfilled. Focus on the things about Carla that make you proud and joyful, and we hope she will do the same.

Dear Annie: My grandmother recently passed away, and my once close-knit clan has been at one another's throats ever since. Her 11 grandchildren have not spoken to each other since the reading of the will.

Grandma left 10 of us a meager monetary inheritance, which was wonderful considering we were not expecting anything at all. Then, as a shock, she left $15,000 to the 11th cousin, "Sherry." Grandma justified this decision in the will, stating that Sherry has a severe vision problem and she hoped her gift would make Sherry's life a little easier.

Well, Annie, Sherry's life may be financially easier, but the rest of us have had little, if anything, to do with her. There is such horrible resentment that we do not care to be around her. Also, our fond memories of Grandma have been tainted by this one severe act of favoritism.


Please tell your readers that what seems like a lovely gesture at the time can have long-lasting and deeply cutting results. -- Feeling Slighted in West Virginia

Dear West Virginia: We agree that children and grandchildren should be treated as equally as possible when it comes to wills, but we have to ask -- why are you punishing Sherry because Grandma thought one grandchild's vision problem could be helped with money? Did Sherry pressure Grandma? Has she become obnoxious since inheriting the money? If the only reason you are not speaking is because you are jealous and resentful, it's YOUR fault now. Forgive Grandma and stop blaming Sherry. It's not worth the breakup of your family.

Dear Annie: This is for "Apart in New Mexico," whose kids missed their father while he was away on his business trips. I also travel a lot and miss my kids. A simple solution is to buy a cheap videocamera for the computer. Now I can talk to my kids and actually see them while I am away. They can hold up their school papers to show me their grades. The best part is that it's free. I can stay online with them as long as we like. -- Traveler in Georgia

Dear Georgia: Another wonderful idea for traveling parents. Thanks.


"Annie's Mailbox" is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar. This column was originally published in 2017. To find out more about Classic Annie's Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit Creators Syndicate at




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