Date nights are rare in my world -- so rare that they have become a tad mythological. Sure, people claim there are unicorns walking through the woods having tea parties with Bigfoot. But have you ever seen it happen in person? That's how I feel about dinner and a movie.
A few friends of mine fill their Facebook news feeds with fancy dinners ...Read more
My 2-year-old daughter's New Year's resolution is, apparently, giving up pants.
That's not to say she has given up pants for skirts. She is not acquiescing to the patriarchy, nor has she developed some sort of weird skin rash that prefers skirts to the feeling of pants against her shins. There has been no toddler-sized religious reckoning or ...Read more
We knew that Pig was dying for about three months before we made that hard choice to put him down. Our 18-pound rabbit had been the most excellent pet and was loved dearly by his human younger siblings. Because Pig's tumor was visible, it was easy to talk to the kids about the cancer and prepare them for his death. Our eldest knew it was ...Read more
One of the hardest things about the holidays is that while we are connecting with the loved ones whom we typically don't get to see very often, we are totally not connecting with the ones we see every day. When your days are filled with visiting distant relatives (was that my first cousin twice removed or my great-niece?) and distant friends (...Read more
An inordinate amount of time was spent deciding on my shoes. It was cold outside, so boots were a must, but which ones? There were the expensive boots that I had purchased in a flash sale for approximately 3,000 percent off. They were sophisticated and hip -- everything I needed to embellish my outfit -- but they were also high-heeled. Or I ...Read more
One of my favorite lines in the film "Love Actually" comes when Emma Thompson's character's children return from school and tell her the roles they were given in the school play. Her daughter proudly announces that she was awarded the role of first lobster, to which Emma Thompson's character replies, "There was more than one lobster present at...Read more
My life has forever changed. And now, so will yours.
Breyers had the genius notion to allow mere mortals like us to eat heaping spoonfuls of just the most delicious part of our favorite celebratory dessert, in its new flavor called "ice cream cake."
No more needing to sharpen your garden clippers or rev up the electric saw to cut through the...Read more
I did not shop on Thanksgiving. I did not shop on Black Friday. In fact, I've taken all of November off. And I'm thinking of making December a shopping-free month, too. When it comes to gift giving, I've become a regular Ebenezer Scrooge.
Despite my love of literary antiheroes, I diverge from my Dickensian soul mate when it comes to children. ...Read more
Outland Exil, Vol. 1 (Old Men and Infidels)W. Clark Boutwell
America is dead and the Democratic Unity killed it. After catastrophic wars and the Meltdown, The Unity rules from its East Coast citadel, leaving the outlands to savages and its strangely altered plants. Providing free health care,...
In my youth, I scaled mountains.
Nay, I scaled mountain ranges.
When I was an adventure tour guide in Papua New Guinea, we hired a team of locals to take intrepid travelers from one isolated village to the next, up one mountain and down another. Days of hiking, thorns digging into our skin as we trudged on. Wading through rivers. Slipping ...Read more
We knew we weren't ready for a dog. The search for the perfect pet began there.
"Cat?" my husband suggested.
"I'd rather not invite something into my home that would immediately begin plotting my death," I said. "How about a rabbit?"
"Why would we get a pet that needs to stay in a cage?"
I saw his point. We were getting our first pet as a ...Read more
My daughter's superpower is unleashed in the form of persuading anyone and everyone to give her free food. Food is her No. 1 mission in life, and like 007, she never misses her mark -- or chicken drumstick, for that matter.
It helps that she is roly-poly and adorable, but don't be fooled into thinking there is little more happening here than ...Read more
"What do you think about this?" she said to me, holding up a checkered midriff shirt.
"For me or a doll?"
The sales clerk laughed. And she was genuinely adorable. "For you!"
"Yea-a-a-a-h, I'm pretty sure my midriff days are over," I said.
"Really?" She asked. "Do they end?"
See? What'd I tell you? Adorable.
"It's pretty cool-looking," she ...Read more
"It's a Euro-electro-funk band. You're in, right?"
Returning to college in your 30s is weird.
"I don't think I know what that is," I said.
My 19-year-old classmate laughed as if I were joking.
"No, really. What is that?" I asked.
"I know, right? It feels like it's been forever since I moshed hard -- like, three months."...Read more