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Succeeding in Your Business

Give Me a Perfect Life ... Or I'll Kill You

Cliff Ennico
Is it just me, or are people getting awfully touchy these days?

Within the past week, I have received calls from three consultants and other professionals who had received screaming phone calls from their clients threatening lawsuits for things they absolutely weren't responsible for. Without getting into specifics, here's what the clients said:

"I did something stupid and it's your fault because you kept distracting me with e-mails that required me to think";

"Even though you pointed out several reasons why this was a bad deal, and I ignored your advice and went ahead with the deal anyway, you are liable for anything that happens because you didn't do enough to prevent me from going forward";

"I know I authorized you to agree to certain things with the other side, but I've changed my mind now and I want you to undo this deal and get me my money back, or else."

It would be a simple matter to just dismiss these people as cranks, crazies or people with anger management issues, but I think it's symptomatic of a much bigger problem in American society today ... one that affects all business owners.

People today -- at least in the United States -- are a lot different than they were when the Greatest Generation ruled society. Fifty years ago, people were inundated with moral and ethical training from their diapers -- they belonged to churches, synagogues and other religious bodies (and actually went to them regularly). They attended religious schools that drilled civil behavior and personal responsibility into them. Shared community values were rigorously and fearlessly enforced by clergypeople, teachers and others whose authority in such matters was not questioned.

Also, the Greatest Generation knew what true deprivation was -- they had survived the Great Depression in the 1930s, World War II in the 1940s, and the Cold War in the 1950s -- and remembered times when they lied awake at night wondering if there would be food on the table, or if The Bomb would drop. They were a lot tougher than we are, folks, but they simply couldn't be rude or uncivil to anyone that had shared the "common causes" of those days with them. Obviously, things are a lot different today. Many people think it's better now than it was back then, and they certainly are right about some things. We are a much more inclusive society now than we were in the 1950s -- women, African-Americans, Jewish-Americans, Asian-Americans, gays and other ethnic minorities have a lot more clout today (politically, legally and socially) than they did back then. Also, when was the last time you truly worried about when your next meal came from?

Yet, in a curious paradox, the more egalitarian, pluralistic and prosperous our society has become, the less civil, courteous and respectful our society has become. There are few if any shared values that keep us tied together as citizens of a commonwealth anymore. The maxims "if it feels good, do it" and "live for today" that were drilled into our heads during the 1960s and 1970s have become our guiding credos today.

The decline of authority and shared community values is, of course, not a novel topic. But I don't think a lot of people recognize the root causes of today's ruthless, neurotic, decency-challenged American society. Here they are:

Fifty years of unparalleled peace and prosperity in America -- three generations of Americans who (except for the minority who have actually served in the U.S. military) have never experienced war, pestilence or famine firsthand -- when you aren't used to bad things happening in your life, even extremely minor bad things can easily be blown way out of proportion;

The rise of a secular, multiethnic society that places individual freedom and "liberation" over everything else, and that offers little if any consensus or "top-down" direction on ethical matters and social etiquette. (Yes, a lot of those "middle-class bourgeois American values" the Greatest Generation held dear were B.S., but they were B.S. that held us together as a society and therefore served a useful function); and

Frankly, the worst economic recession in over 50 years -- people are scared, and scared people say and do crazy things sometimes.

It is not an exaggeration to say that many if not most Americans today are spoiled children (what author Christopher Noxon calls "rejuveniles") who expect a perfect, unblemished life as a natural right of mankind. They cannot accept adversity of any kind, no matter how slight, because they never have been exposed to it and cannot accept it as just a natural part of life. When something bad happens to somebody, it's somebody else's fault, and damn It, those sons-of-whatever are going to pay!

Fifty years ago and earlier, if something bad happened to someone (even if caused by other people, such as a doctor's negligence or being laid off by a failing employer), it was viewed as fate, Kismet or "God working in mysterious ways". Religion taught acceptance, forgiveness, personal responsibility and moving on with your life. Today, if someone has a bad experience, it becomes a knockout, drag-out fight with lawsuits threatened and people afraid of doing their jobs for fear of getting sued and losing their homes.

Everywhere I go I see bumper stickers saying "question authority." It's time to stop questioning authority, stop talking about "rights" and start talking about "duties," "responsibilities," and -- yes -- "sins." If we don't, authority may well be questioned out of existence altogether, and there will be nothing holding us together as a civil society except our creaking, out-of-date legal system.

Cliff Ennico (crennico@gmail.com) is a syndicated columnist, author and former host of the PBS television series "Money Hunt." This column is no substitute for legal, tax or financial advice, which can be furnished only by a qualified professional licensed in your state. To find out more about Cliff Ennico and other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit our Web page at www.creators.com.

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Copyright 2009 Creators Syndicate Inc.

This news arrived on: 10/13/2009
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Posted Comments:

10-20-2009 01:55
respect wrote:

Great Article!!!

Just weeks ago, I was the epitome of what you have outlined in this paper. I discovered that my poor diet had been causing negativity to spew from my mouth constantly. Since my self discovery, I have been proclaiming the same sentiments that you have outlined, to everyone i know and care for. I am excited to see that someone else is catching on to the same ideas. If we can all start using positive thought on a daily basis to overcome our challenges, we will ALL be much happier people. But it starts with our health. Without proper health, we are all sick! And that is clinically a fact. How can we be a great society if we are all sick? I love the freedom of america and don't support a large gorvernment, but our society is unable to be selfless in all aspects of life.



10-16-2009 13:15
akins wrote:

Give me a perfect life

Unfortunately, America is not alone in this narrow minded view of life.
Well written!



10-13-2009 11:29
VeeCee wrote:

Give Me a Perfect Life .... or I'll Kill You

In your article you make the following statement "....and remembered times when they lied awake at night..."

Surely you mean -- when they "lay: awake ...--
"lied" means to tell a falsehood.




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