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Yet, by that theory, long-lasting marriages sound like an unnatural act. That's contrary, as the Los Angeles Times' Robin Abcarian reports, to census data that indicate marital breakups are more likely to occur in the early years than later.

The "conscious uncoupling" conundrum caught my eye as a new front in a culture war that stretches far beyond Hollywood. The institution of marriage has become a central and contentious issue in debates of all sorts in recent decades, especially its decline in families with children.

In fact, if there is any place in our society where firearms have declined, one might say, it is the fading ethos of the "shotgun marriage."

That's the old-fashioned label for the expectation that young men who impregnated their sweethearts would, in the great lyrics of a Beyonce hit, "put a ring on it."

Although out-of-wedlock births have soared sharply, most famously but not only among African-Americans, census data reveal that the decline of marriage is linked less to race than to differences in income and education.

Out-of-wedlock births among high school dropouts, for example, have soared in all major racial groups since the mid-1960s, while those among college graduates have hardly budged.

Paltrow and Martin are at the other end of that debate. They're rich and married and, by their own accounts, they put in a good try before they decided to call it quits. The term "conscious uncoupling" sounds like a way to say, "Hey, we tried -- and we're still going to take care of the kids like good, if separated, parents."

With that, they suggest what should be the core concern in the marriage debate: taking care of the kids. In that task, as a fellow parent, I wish Paltrow and Martin the best. To raise children, both parents need to work together. Call it "conscientious coupling."

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E-mail Clarence Page at cpage@tribune.com.

(c) 2014 CLARENCE PAGE DISTRIBUTED BY TRIBUNE MEDIA SERVICES, INC.