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Today's Stock Market Report
Feathers were down.
Paper was stationary.
Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.
Knives were up sharply.
Cows steered into a bull market.
Pencils lost a few points.
Hiking equipment was trailing.
Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.
Weights were up in heavy trading.
Light switches were off.
Mining equipment hit rock bottom.
Diapers remained unchanged.
Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.
The market for raisins dried up.
Coca Cola fizzled.
Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.
Sun peaked at midday.
Balloon prices were inflated.
Scott Tissue touched a new bottom.
And batteries exploded in an attempt to recharge the market.
This news arrived on: 09/02/2008
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Posted Comments:
09-06-2008 18:21
wrote:
I think the highs and lows of it are kind of cute and a lot of thought went into writing them.
09-06-2008 13:35
I wrote:
boring but i have to say the last line made me chuckle
09-06-2008 09:49
karen wrote:
this joke a 2
09-06-2008 09:33
I wrote:
stock market report
Having attempted to learn about the forex for the past year and a half, I can certainly appreciate this one.
09-06-2008 09:10
M.C.Dunn wrote:
Today's Stock Market Report
I have to say that I hate long drawn out jokes that sometimes are just not funny,or you don't even want to get to the point of it because it starts out dry and gets even dryer as you read it.So,I'll have to say that this is the best ever!
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