Humor
/Entertainment
Two Lawyers
Two lawyers were walking along, negotiating a case.
"Look," said one to the other, "let's be honest with each other."
"Okay, you first," replied the other.
That was the end of the discussion.
Opposition
The president of a large corporation opened his directors meeting by announcing, "All those who are opposed to the plan I am about to propose will reply by saying, 'I resign'."
Worry Wart
"I'd give a thousand dollars to the man who would worry for me!"
"You're on. Now, where is those thousand dollars?"
"That is your first worry!"
Animal Sounds
(From the 1990s)
A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3-year-old daughter.
The mother said, "What does the cow say?"
The child answered, "Moo!"
The mother then said, "Great! What does the cat say?"
The child replied, "Meow."
The mother exclaimed, "Oh, you're so smart! What does the frog say?"
The wide-eyed little 3-year-old ...Read more
Interesting Questions
Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?
Why is it that bullets ricochet off of Superman's chest, but he ducks when the empty gun is thrown at him?
When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at ...Read more
A New Dance Craze Sweeps Across The Americas
This guy will do anything to distract attention from the Epstein Files.
Amy Madigan Says John Candy Is The Sexiest Man Alive | David Letterman
Amy can't get enough of her "Uncle Buck" co-star. (From "Late Night," air date: 8/16/89)
Elf on the Shelf Support Group - SNL
A group of elves on the shelves share their traumatic Christmas stories.
Betty White Roasts Everyone l The Dean Martin Roasts
Betty White was a beloved American actress, comedian, and television pioneer with a career spanning over eight decades. Best known for her roles as Sue Ann Nivens on The Mary Tyler Moore Show and Rose Nylund on The Golden Girls, she captivated audiences with her sharp wit and comedic timing. A trailblazer for women in entertainment, White was ...Read more
Robin Williams Helps Matt Damon with His Monologue
Robin Williams Helps Matt Damon with His Monologue
Atheists Don't Have No Songs - Steve Martin and the Steep Canyon Rangers feat. Edie Brickell
Clip from Steve Martin and the Steep Canyon Rangers featuring Edie Brickell Live. The entire concert is at Great Performances on PBS.
Eggplants
A grocer put up a sign that read "Eggplants, 25 each -- three for a dollar."
All day long, customers came in exclaiming: "Don't be ridiculous! I should get four for a dollar!"
Meekly the grocer capitulated and packaged four eggplants. The tailor next door had been watching these antics and finally asked the grocer, "Aren't you going to fix ...Read more
Aisle Seat
I had someone ask for an aisle seat on the plane so that their hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.
The Island
From a passenger ship, everyone can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting and desperately waving his hands.
"Who is it?" a passenger asks the captain.
"I've no idea. Every year when we pass, he goes nuts."
Purchasing Brain Power
A mid-level executive was so frustrated at being passed over for promotion year after year, that, in frustration, he went to a brain-transplant center in the hope of raising his I.Q. 20 points.
After a battery of physical and psychological tests, he was told by the center's director that he was an acceptable candidate.
"That's great!" the ...Read more
Crossing The River
Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large, raging violent river. Needing to get on the other side, the first man prayed, "Lord, please give me the strength to cross the river."
Poof! Lord gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice.
After witnessing ...Read more
