Humor

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Sunday School

Humor / Jokes /

Johnny was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday School.

"Well, mum, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt.

"When he got to the Red Sea he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then he used his walkie-talkie to ...Read more

Doorbell

Humor / Jokes /

A man is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach. After watching the boy's efforts for some time, the man moves closer to the boy's position.

He steps smartly across the street, walks up ...Read more

A New Kind of Car

Humor / Jokes /

Two guys sat down for lunch in the office cafeteria.

"Hey, whatever happened to Pete in payroll?"one asked.

"He got this harebrained notion he was going to build a new kind of car," his co-worker replied.

"How was he going to do it?"

"He took an engine from a Pontiac, tires from a Chevy, seats from a Lincoln, hubcaps from Caddy and, well, ...Read more

Fifty-Fifty

Humor / Jokes /

A young man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at Burger King. He noticed that they ordered one meal, and an extra drink cup. As he watched, the gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries. One for him, one for her, until each had half of them. Then he poured half of the soft drink into the extra cup, ...Read more

Army of the Lord

Humor / Jokes /

A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and as always the preacher was standing at the door shaking hands as the congregation departed. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.

The preacher said to him, "You need to join the Army of the Lord!"

My friend replied, "I'm already in the Army of the Lord, Preacher." ...Read more

Desi Lydic Foxsplains Anthony Fauci's Pandemic Diary | The Daily Show

Humor / Jokes /

Fox News got a hold of Anthony Fauci's Covid-era diary, and Desi Lydic is ready to Foxsplain every evil detail.

Sarah Silverman’s PowerPoint to Find Tiffany Haddish a Man

Humor / Jokes /

Sarah Silverman doesn’t understand how her amazing pal Tiffany Haddish is single, so she makes a PowerPoint presentation to help woo suitors for her.

Anna Kendrick On Naked Selfies | CONAN on TBS

Humor / Jokes /

Anna is fine with people taking nude pics of themselves, just so long as they're not slobs!

Dustin Hoffman Mistakes Letterman for Jay Leno | David Letterman

Humor / Jokes /

Dave and Dustin Hoffman look back at their Kennedy Center Honors, The Graduate, and funny stories from Hoffman's early acting days. (Air date: 12/7/2012)

The Muppets "Octopus's Garden" (The Beatles Cover) on The Ed Sullivan Show

Humor / Jokes /

The Muppets cover of The Beatles "Octopus's Garden" on The Ed Sullivan Show, March 1, 1970.

Blonde on Horseback pt. 1

Humor / Jokes /

A blonde from California decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion.

It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem ...Read more

George Halas

Humor / Jokes /

Years ago famed Chicago Bears coach George Halas was screaming at a referee from outside the designated coaching area when the ref slapped George with a 5 yard penalty.

Halas threw down his hat and yelled at the referee, "You imbecile, it's a fifteen yard penalty, not a five yarder for coaching outside the box!"

To which the referee supposedly...Read more

Things to Remember During a War

Humor / Jokes /

1. The only things more accurate than enemy fire is friendly fire.
2. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
3. Teamwork is essential. It gives them more targets to shoot at.
4. No inspection-ready unit ever passed combat.
5. No combat-ready unit ever passed inspection.
6. Remember: your aircraft was ...Read more

Filling in for Saint Peter

Humor / Jokes /

A famous professor of surgery died and went to heaven. At the pearly gate he was asked by the gatekeeper: 'Have you ever committed a sin you truly regret?'

'Yes,' the professor answered. 'When I was a young candidate at the hospital of Saint Lucas, we played soccer against at team from the Community Hospital, and I scored a goal, which was ...Read more

Tie Discipline

Humor / Jokes /

A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school.

Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the...Read more

Josh Johnson Dives Into the Internet Frenzy Over the JPMorgan “Sex Slave” Lawsuit | The Daily Show

Humor / Jokes /

Josh Johnson deep-dives into a viral sexual harassment lawsuit at JPMorgan, where a male employee accused a female colleague of coercing him into a "sex slave" arrangement, setting off a frenzy of sexist memes and sensational media coverage before the evidence apparently unraveled under scrutiny.

Trump's Military Asks Troops for "Creative" Ideas to Punish Iran as U.S. Runs Low on Missiles

Humor / Jokes /

Jimmy addresses the latest news, like the U.S. using up almost of all its long-range missiles in the Iran war, Iran denying Trump's peace talk claims and the U.S. military asking troops for "creative and unconventional" ideas to punish Iran.

Honest Trailers | Masters of the Universe

Humor / Jokes /

They made a Masters of the Universe movie! Again! Will the 2026 version be more popular than the original? Depends on who’s stronger: the power of Grayskull or the power of elder millennial nostalgia.

Tonight Show Lookalikes: Parks and Recreation Extra, Bobbi in Dressed to Kill | The Tonight Show

Humor / Jokes /

Jimmy reviews submissions from fans of lookalikes found all over the internet and has the audience vote on which lookalike they think is the most accurate.

Four Letter Words Star Style 🤬 | The Graham Norton Show

Humor / Jokes /

Watch celebrities completely ABANDON their polished public personas and let rip with their most COLOURFUL language on our sofa! From accidental slips to absolutely INTENTIONAL outbursts, these A-listers prove that fame doesn't filter your mouth! 🎭✨ Who dropped the biggest on-air bombshell? The most gloriously unfiltered moments in chat show...Read more

 

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