- What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

- I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

- Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.

- Just remember - if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

- Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

- Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapeno's. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.