Please leave your name and number -- But first, a short algebra quiz: How much is 5Q + 5Q? (Pause while caller thinks) 10Q You're welcome!

Men are like fine wine...

They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with.

- Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are trying to get out.

- Marriage is low down, but you spend the rest of your life paying for it.

- Marriage is the process ...Read More

What is evil, ugly and keep the neighbours awake?
A witch with a drum kit!

What goes cackle, cackle, squelch, squelch?
A witch in soggy shoes!

What do you call a witch that flies in Concorde?
Lucky!

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"Did you all see the guy at Yankee Stadium that jumped from the upper deck into the net that catches the foul balls? He jumped like 50 feet. How can anyone get that drunk off $8 beers!" -- Dave Letterman

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At one Army base, the annual trip to the rifle range had been canceled for the second year in a row, but the semi-annual physical fitness test was still on as planned.

One soldier mused, “Does it bother anyone else that...Read More