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Metamorphosis
"Gregor", said his father now from the room to his left, "the chief
clerk has come round and wants to know why you didn't leave on the
early train. We don't know what to say to him. And anyway, he wants
to speak to you personally. So please open up this door. I'm sure
he'll be good enough to forgive the untidiness of your room." Then the
chief clerk called "Good morning, Mr. Samsa". "He isn't well", said
his mother to the chief clerk, while his father continued to speak
through the door. "He isn't well, please believe me. Why else would
Gregor have missed a train! The lad only ever thinks about the
business. It nearly makes me cross the way he never goes out in the
evenings; he's been in town for a week now but stayed home every
evening. He sits with us in the kitchen and just reads the paper or
studies train timetables. His idea of relaxation is working with his
fretsaw. He's made a little frame, for instance, it only took him two
or three evenings, you'll be amazed how nice it is; it's hanging up in
his room; you'll see it as soon as Gregor opens the door. Anyway, I'm
glad you're here; we wouldn't have been able to get Gregor to open the
door by ourselves; he's so stubborn; and I'm sure he isn't well, he
said this morning that he is, but he isn't." "I'll be there in a
moment", said Gregor slowly and thoughtfully, but without moving so
that he would not miss any word of the conversation. "Well I can't
think of any other way of explaining it, Mrs. Samsa", said the chief
clerk, "I hope it's nothing serious. But on the other hand, I must
say that if we people in commerce ever become slightly unwell then,
fortunately or unfortunately as you like, we simply have to overcome
it because of business considerations." "Can the chief clerk come in
to see you now then?", asked his father impatiently, knocking at the
door again. "No", said Gregor. In the room on his right there
followed a painful silence; in the room on his left his sister began
to cry.
So why did his sister not go and join the others? She had probably
only just got up and had not even begun to get dressed. And why was
she crying? Was it because he had not got up, and had not let the
chief clerk in, because he was in danger of losing his job and if that
happened his boss would once more pursue their parents with the same
demands as before? There was no need to worry about things like that
yet. Gregor was still there and had not the slightest intention of
abandoning his family. For the time being he just lay there on the
carpet, and no-one who knew the condition he was in would seriously
have expected him to let the chief clerk in. It was only a minor
discourtesy, and a suitable excuse could easily be found for it later
on, it was not something for which Gregor could be sacked on the spot.
And it seemed to Gregor much more sensible to leave him now in peace
instead of disturbing him with talking at him and crying. But the
others didn't know what was happening, they were worried, that would
excuse their behaviour.
The chief clerk now raised his voice, "Mr. Samsa", he called to him,
"what is wrong? You barricade yourself in your room, give us no more
than yes or no for an answer, you are causing serious and unnecessary
concern to your parents and you fail - and I mention this just by the
way - you fail to carry out your business duties in a way that is
quite unheard of. I'm speaking here on behalf of your parents and of
your employer, and really must request a clear and immediate
explanation. I am astonished, quite astonished. I thought I knew you
as a calm and sensible person, and now you suddenly seem to be showing
off with peculiar whims. This morning, your employer did suggest a
possible reason for your failure to appear, it's true - it had to do
with the money that was recently entrusted to you - but I came near to
giving him my word of honour that that could not be the right
explanation. But now that I see your incomprehensible stubbornness I
no longer feel any wish whatsoever to intercede on your behalf. And
nor is your position all that secure. I had originally intended to
say all this to you in private, but since you cause me to waste my
time here for no good reason I don't see why your parents should not
also learn of it. Your turnover has been very unsatisfactory of late;
I grant you that it's not the time of year to do especially good
business, we recognise that; but there simply is no time of year to do
no business at all, Mr. Samsa, we cannot allow there to be."
"But Sir", called Gregor, beside himself and forgetting all else in
the excitement, "I'll open up immediately, just a moment. I'm
slightly unwell, an attack of dizziness, I haven't been able to get
up. I'm still in bed now. I'm quite fresh again now, though. I'm
just getting out of bed. Just a moment. Be patient! It's not quite
as easy as I'd thought. I'm quite alright now, though. It's
shocking, what can suddenly happen to a person! I was quite alright
last night, my parents know about it, perhaps better than me, I had a
small symptom of it last night already. They must have noticed it. I
don't know why I didn't let you know at work! But you always think you
can get over an illness without staying at home. Please, don't make
my parents suffer! There's no basis for any of the accusations you're
making; nobody's ever said a word to me about any of these things.
Maybe you haven't read the latest contracts I sent in. I'll set off
with the eight o'clock train, as well, these few hours of rest have
given me strength. You don't need to wait, sir; I'll be in the office
soon after you, and please be so good as to tell that to the boss and
recommend me to him!"
And while Gregor gushed out these words, hardly knowing what he was
saying, he made his way over to the chest of drawers - this was easily
done, probably because of the practise he had already had in bed -
where he now tried to get himself upright. He really did want to open
the door, really did want to let them see him and to speak with the
chief clerk; the others were being so insistent, and he was curious to
learn what they would say when they caught sight of him. If they were
shocked then it would no longer be Gregor's responsibility and he
could rest. If, however, they took everything calmly he would still
have no reason to be upset, and if he hurried he really could be at
the station for eight o'clock. The first few times he tried to climb
up on the smooth chest of drawers he just slid down again, but he
finally gave himself one last swing and stood there upright; the lower
part of his body was in serious pain but he no longer gave any
attention to it. Now he let himself fall against the back of a nearby
chair and held tightly to the edges of it with his little legs. By
now he had also calmed down, and kept quiet so that he could listen to
what the chief clerk was saying.
"Did you understand a word of all that?" the chief clerk asked his
parents, "surely he's not trying to make fools of us". "Oh, God!"
called his mother, who was already in tears, "he could be seriously
ill and we're making him suffer. Grete! Grete!" she then cried.
"Mother?" his sister called from the other side. They communicated
across Gregor's room. "You'll have to go for the doctor straight
away. Gregor is ill. Quick, get the doctor. Did you hear the way
Gregor spoke just now?" "That was the voice of an animal", said the
chief clerk, with a calmness that was in contrast with his mother's
screams. "Anna! Anna!" his father called into the kitchen through the
entrance hall, clapping his hands, "get a locksmith here, now!" And
the two girls, their skirts swishing, immediately ran out through the
hall, wrenching open the front door of the flat as they went. How had
his sister managed to get dressed so quickly? There was no sound of
the door banging shut again; they must have left it open; people
often do in homes where something awful has happened.
Gregor, in contrast, had become much calmer. So they couldn't
understand his words any more, although they seemed clear enough to
him, clearer than before - perhaps his ears had become used to the
sound. They had realised, though, that there was something wrong with
him, and were ready to help. The first response to his situation had
been confident and wise, and that made him feel better. He felt that
he had been drawn back in among people, and from the doctor and the
locksmith he expected great and surprising achievements - although he
did not really distinguish one from the other. Whatever was said next
would be crucial, so, in order to make his voice as clear as possible,
he coughed a little, but taking care to do this not too loudly as even
this might well sound different from the way that a human coughs and
he was no longer sure he could judge this for himself. Meanwhile, it
had become very quiet in the next room. Perhaps his parents were sat
at the table whispering with the chief clerk, or perhaps they were all
pressed against the door and listening.
Gregor slowly pushed his way over to the door with the chair. Once
there he let go of it and threw himself onto the door, holding himself
upright against it using the adhesive on the tips of his legs. He
rested there a little while to recover from the effort involved and
then set himself to the task of turning the key in the lock with his
mouth. He seemed, unfortunately, to have no proper teeth - how was
he, then, to grasp the key? - but the lack of teeth was, of course,
made up for with a very strong jaw; using the jaw, he really was able
to start the key turning, ignoring the fact that he must have been
causing some kind of damage as a brown fluid came from his mouth,
flowed over the key and dripped onto the floor. "Listen", said the
chief clerk in the next room, "he's turning the key." Gregor was
greatly encouraged by this; but they all should have been calling to
him, his father and his mother too: "Well done, Gregor", they should
have cried, "keep at it, keep hold of the lock!" And with the idea
that they were all excitedly following his efforts, he bit on the key
with all his strength, paying no attention to the pain he was causing
himself. As the key turned round he turned around the lock with it,
only holding himself upright with his mouth, and hung onto the key or
pushed it down again with the whole weight of his body as needed. The
clear sound of the lock as it snapped back was Gregor's sign that he
could break his concentration, and as he regained his breath he said
to himself: "So, I didn't need the locksmith after all". Then he lay
his head on the handle of the door to open it completely.
Because he had to open the door in this way, it was already wide open
before he could be seen. He had first to slowly turn himself around
one of the double doors, and he had to do it very carefully if he did
not want to fall flat on his back before entering the room. He was
still occupied with this difficult movement, unable to pay attention
to anything else, when he heard the chief clerk exclaim a loud "Oh!",
which sounded like the soughing of the wind. Now he also saw him - he
was the nearest to the door - his hand pressed against his open mouth
and slowly retreating as if driven by a steady and invisible force.
Gregor's mother, her hair still dishevelled from bed despite the chief
clerk's being there, looked at his father. Then she unfolded her
arms, took two steps forward towards Gregor and sank down onto the
floor into her skirts that spread themselves out around her as her
head disappeared down onto her breast. His father looked hostile, and
clenched his fists as if wanting to knock Gregor back into his room.
Then he looked uncertainly round the living room, covered his eyes
with his hands and wept so that his powerful chest shook.
So Gregor did not go into the room, but leant against the inside of
the other door which was still held bolted in place. In this way only
half of his body could be seen, along with his head above it which he
leant over to one side as he peered out at the others. Meanwhile the
day had become much lighter; part of the endless, grey-black building
on the other side of the street - which was a hospital - could be seen
quite clearly with the austere and regular line of windows piercing
its facade; the rain was still falling, now throwing down large,
individual droplets which hit the ground one at a time. The washing
up from breakfast lay on the table; there was so much of it because,
for Gregor's father, breakfast was the most important meal of the day
and he would stretch it out for several hours as he sat reading a
number of different newspapers. On the wall exactly opposite there
was photograph of Gregor when he was a lieutenant in the army, his
sword in his hand and a carefree smile on his face as he called forth
respect for his uniform and bearing. The door to the entrance hall
was open and as the front door of the flat was also open he could see
onto the landing and the stairs where they began their way down below.
"Now, then", said Gregor, well aware that he was the only one to have
kept calm, "I'll get dressed straight away now, pack up my samples and
set off. Will you please just let me leave? You can see", he said to
the chief clerk, "that I'm not stubborn and like I like to do my job;
being a commercial traveller is arduous but without travelling I
couldn't earn my living. So where are you going, in to the office?
Yes? Will you report everything accurately, then? It's quite possible
for someone to be temporarily unable to work, but that's just the
right time to remember what's been achieved in the past and consider
that later on, once the difficulty has been removed, he will certainly
work with all the more diligence and concentration. You're well aware
that I'm seriously in debt to our employer as well as having to look
after my parents and my sister, so that I'm trapped in a difficult
situation, but I will work my way out of it again. Please don't make
things any harder for me than they are already, and don't take sides
against me at the office. I know that nobody likes the travellers.
They think we earn an enormous wage as well as having a soft time of
it. That's just prejudice but they have no particular reason to think
better it. But you, sir, you have a better overview than the rest of
the staff, in fact, if I can say this in confidence, a better overview
than the boss himself - it's very easy for a businessman like him to
make mistakes about his employees and judge them more harshly than he
should. And you're also well aware that we travellers spend almost
the whole year away from the office, so that we can very easily fall
victim to gossip and chance and groundless complaints, and it's almost
impossible to defend yourself from that sort of thing, we don't
usually even hear about them, or if at all it's when we arrive back
home exhausted from a trip, and that's when we feel the harmful
effects of what's been going on without even knowing what caused them.
Please, don't go away, at least first say something to show that you
grant that I'm at least partly right!"
But the chief clerk had turned away as soon as Gregor had started to
speak, and, with protruding lips, only stared back at him over his
trembling shoulders as he left. He did not keep still for a moment
while Gregor was speaking, but moved steadily towards the door without
taking his eyes off him. He moved very gradually, as if there had
been some secret prohibition on leaving the room. It was only when he
had reached the entrance hall that he made a sudden movement, drew his
foot from the living room, and rushed forward in a panic. In the
hall, he stretched his right hand far out towards the stairway as if
out there, there were some supernatural force waiting to save him.