Why can't we use nuclear weapons against bedbugs?
WASHINGTON -- Have you heard the one about the lawbreaker who got pardoned by President Trump?
It's so funny it's criminal.
As The Washington Post's Nick Miroff and Josh Dawsey report, Trump has told his subordinates to seize private land and disregard environmental rules as they build a border wall, offering to pardon them for breaking the law. The White House response? Trump is joking.
Hahahahahahaha. My sides are totally splitting.
That was almost as funny as the time when -- stop me if you've heard this one -- Trump told Russia to hack into Hillary Clinton's emails. "He was joking," the White House said.
So deadpan was Trump's humor then that the Russians didn't get the joke; they began acting on Trump's request within hours, special counsel Robert Mueller found. Now that's funny.
And who can forget the hilarious time when Trump told law enforcement officers that they should feel free to rough up the people they arrest?
"He was making a joke," the White House said.
The incorrigible cutup! Even the head of the Drug Enforcement Administration was fooled by the president's wickedly subtle humor. He issued a statement warning agents not to follow the president's advice.