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When we first saw Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch on television in the late 1980s, a sarcastic friend of mine wisecracked, "Wow, that looks like a pedophile's paradise."

I tried not to laugh. Like multitudes of others, I had been following Jackson's hit songs and dazzling dance moves since his early days with his brothers in the Jackson Five from Gary, Ind.

I excused his odd excesses -- his cosmetic surgeries, his pet chimp, his ranch in Santa Barbara County with its own amusement park and petting zoo -- as an understandable consequence of his breathtaking wealth and perhaps his urgent need to construct his own fantasyland to make up for the normal childhood he never had.

My excuse-making ended with the airing on Sunday and Monday of Dan Reed's unsettling HBO documentary, "Leaving Neverland," a two-part, four-hour re-examination of sexual abuse charges by Wade Robson and James Safechuck, two men who say Jackson sexually abused them at the Neverland Ranch when they were children.

We can now add Jackson's name to those of R. Kelly, Bill Cosby, Woody Allen, Harvey Weinstein, Kevin Spacey and others whose commercial success has been disrupted by allegations of sexual misconduct that, in Cosby's case, resulted in a guilty verdict and prison on three counts of aggravated indecent assault.

Sure, it is important to remember, as the Jackson family points out in a response to the documentary, that Robson and Safechuck gave statements on the pop star's behalf in a 1993 sexual abuse case brought by a different boy and settled out of court. Robson also testified on Jackson's behalf in the 2005 case in which a jury found Jackson not guilty of child molestation and administering an intoxicating substance. In its statement, the Jackson family denounced the documentary as a "public lynching."

Yet the documentary and the hourlong town hall-style discussion led by Oprah Winfrey that followed make a gut-wrenching case study of what she calls a widely misunderstood and underappreciated aspect of child abuse: the grooming process in which the predator befriends the family, draws the child away from his or her parents and tightens emotional bonds with the child.

After noting that she has hosted 217 episodes on child sexual abuse on her TV talk shows, Winfrey concluded, "Sexual abuse ... is also sexual seduction."

That's a bracingly important point. Our stereotypes of pedophiles as violent rapists defy the more common reality of children being persuaded to sympathize with and aid the predator as a sign of love and devotion. Typically, these are children too young to understand what love or sexual relations are all about.

Still, one of the great mysteries that emerged in the early days of the Neverland scandal still haunts us: How could parents leave their children alone with Jackson for what became days at a time?

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(c) 2019 CLARENCE PAGE DISTRIBUTED BY TRIBUNE MEDIA SERVICES, INC.