Senior Living

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Health

Dear Doug: Too Many Apologies

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: Recently, a friend told me that I can be awfully negative. Apparently, I'm always apologizing for small things -- to the point where it puts people off.

I was shocked. We've known each other a long time, and I know that she has my best interests at heart, but it still stung. I've always tried to be conscientious about other people and their ...Read more

Dear Doug: Senior Valentines

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My wife and I celebrated our 53rd wedding anniversary last year. None of our friends have reached that milestone, and I feel very blessed. But there are some things that get harder with time.

Due to our age, neither of us is as mobile as we once were. We both used to enjoy going out for a big date, but we haven't felt up for it the last few ...Read more

Dear Doug: House Rules

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: We have two grandsons, 8 and 10 years old, and they're both great kids. Unlike many of our friends, we're lucky to live near our family and be part of their childhood memories. Part of that means that they spend a lot of time at our home. But they are so messy! They leave toys and dirty clothes all over and run roughshod over our dog. My ...Read more

Dear Doug: Old Hurts

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: Growing up, I always felt like my mother didn't love me. She was critical and unsupportive, and I believe that she regretted having me at all. I am an only child and was unplanned.

My father did his best to show his love for me, and my relationship with him showed me how lacking my bond with my mother is and was. She has never once told me ...Read more

Dear Doug: Learning New Tricks in Old Age

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: For as long as I've been alive, I've never bought a car. My husband always took care of it, but he passed away several years ago.

My current car has lasted me a long time but is on its last legs.

I'm afraid to even go into a car dealership. I don't know a lot about cars and know that some dealerships are very aggressive when trying to sell....Read more

Dear Doug: Exercise Plan

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: I just turned 70 and have always been in good health. Despite my luck, I'm noticing that I share the same aches and pains as my friends.

I've maintained my weight since my 30s. I don't smoke, and I rarely drink. I'm active but not with any particular plan. Instead, I've kept up with nature walks, the occasional tennis match and housework.

...Read more

Dear Doug: Self-Sufficiency

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My husband passed away six years ago, and moving on has been a process. We were married for 37 years, and being on my own is strange, even now.

I never realized how much of my identity was formed by our relationship. We grew around each other with our own interests and talents. Beyond just missing my spouse, I've found myself having to ...Read more

Dear Doug: Too Late for Change?

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: People around me have been talking about their plans for the new year, especially their resolutions for 2020.

I always liked making my own resolutions but haven't made any for the last several years. Because of my age, I make excuses that any plans don't matter and that my health could fail me at any time.

When our family was talking about ...Read more

Dear Doug: Family Entertainment

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My wife and I have been getting excited to have all of our children and grandchildren over for Christmas. This is the only time all year that we all get to be in the same room at the same time.

It doesn't happen every time, but often at least one grandchild gets worn out from the party and gets fussy. We have one grandson who's 14, but the ...Read more

Dear Doug: Gift Equalizing

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: This Christmas, I wanted to give my grandchildren some of our family heirlooms. I was planning to give jewelry to my three granddaughters and a watch to one of my two grandsons.

Unfortunately, I don't think my other grandson would appreciate that sort of present. From previous experience, I've learned that he wants cash, and I honestly ...Read more

Dear Doug: Communication Setbacks

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: It's getting harder and harder for our family to talk to my dad. He's in his early 90s and still up and moving, but he's no longer on top of it.

Our main problem is that he doesn't make sense. He starts talking about topics without any introduction, so we spend several minutes in confusion. He also doesn't seem to listen to our responses ...Read more

Dear Doug: Relationships & Abstinence From Drinking

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My health is getting worse, and I've made the decision to stop drinking. Alcohol has been making me feel awful, and it's no longer worth it. It interacts badly with my medication and makes me feel ill for several days.

I've been seeing a woman in my retirement complex for about a year, and she's a heavy drinker. She doesn't seem to have any ...Read more

Dear Doug: Family Feud

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: I've never gotten along with my brother-in-law, which makes family gatherings very awkward. It's especially strange, as I usually can get along with just about anyone.

No matter what I say, he finds reasons to correct me. His corrections are usually minor and sometimes completely wrong. It seems like he's compelled to have the last word.

I ...Read more

 

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