Senior Living



Dear Doug: Internal Positivity

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: I've always been very influenced by other people. Even though I find it easy to be happy and upbeat when things are good, I find my mood plunging whenever things start to go wrong.

How can I keep my mood up when things go wrong?

A: Get to know yourself a little better. People with a strong sense of self are less affected by outside ...Read more

Dear Doug: Coupon Obsession

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My wife and I looked forward to retirement for a long time. I devoted most of my time to a demanding job and am now taking my time and enjoying life. We made enough money to live comfortably for a long time to come.

We have no serious debts, and our mortgage is almost paid off. But you wouldn't know our financial situation based on my wife's...Read more

Dear Doug: Back to Dating

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My wife and I were unhappy together for at least the last 15 years of our marriage. We recognized that our relationship wasn't going to get any better, so we bit the bullet and filed for divorce. It went about as smoothly as possible and is now finalized. We still love each other but weren't good partners.

Now that I'm single, I'm ready to ...Read more

Dear Doug: Senior Depression

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My mom has been on her own since my dad passed away about a decade ago. She dealt with it reasonably well and even dated for a while.

Now she's not doing so well. She's sad all the time and has retreated from her regular activities. Our family is pretty sure she's depressed.

What are the best ways to address this? Is it natural, or can we ...Read more

Dear Doug: Keeping Young

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: Some people just seem to age better. I am in my late 60s and just moved into a retirement community with my husband.

Being around so many seniors has made me really think about how differently people age. Some people here are around my age, but you couldn't tell by looking at them. They easily look a decade older.

On the other hand, there ...Read more

Dear Doug: Grandchild Favoritism

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: I feel bad about it, but I have a favorite grandchild. My wife and I only had one child and didn't have the problem of comparing him with any siblings.

Now he has two children of his own, and I like my granddaughter more than her brother. She's very thoughtful and sweet. My grandson is sweet as well, but he's like a tornado. He creates a ...Read more

Dear Doug: Too Many Apologies

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: Recently, a friend told me that I can be awfully negative. Apparently, I'm always apologizing for small things -- to the point where it puts people off.

I was shocked. We've known each other a long time, and I know that she has my best interests at heart, but it still stung. I've always tried to be conscientious about other people and their ...Read more

Dear Doug: Senior Valentines

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My wife and I celebrated our 53rd wedding anniversary last year. None of our friends have reached that milestone, and I feel very blessed. But there are some things that get harder with time.

Due to our age, neither of us is as mobile as we once were. We both used to enjoy going out for a big date, but we haven't felt up for it the last few ...Read more

Dear Doug: House Rules

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: We have two grandsons, 8 and 10 years old, and they're both great kids. Unlike many of our friends, we're lucky to live near our family and be part of their childhood memories. Part of that means that they spend a lot of time at our home. But they are so messy! They leave toys and dirty clothes all over and run roughshod over our dog. My ...Read more

Dear Doug: Old Hurts

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: Growing up, I always felt like my mother didn't love me. She was critical and unsupportive, and I believe that she regretted having me at all. I am an only child and was unplanned.

My father did his best to show his love for me, and my relationship with him showed me how lacking my bond with my mother is and was. She has never once told me ...Read more

Dear Doug: Learning New Tricks in Old Age

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: For as long as I've been alive, I've never bought a car. My husband always took care of it, but he passed away several years ago.

My current car has lasted me a long time but is on its last legs.

I'm afraid to even go into a car dealership. I don't know a lot about cars and know that some dealerships are very aggressive when trying to sell....Read more

Dear Doug: Exercise Plan

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: I just turned 70 and have always been in good health. Despite my luck, I'm noticing that I share the same aches and pains as my friends.

I've maintained my weight since my 30s. I don't smoke, and I rarely drink. I'm active but not with any particular plan. Instead, I've kept up with nature walks, the occasional tennis match and housework.

...Read more

Dear Doug: Self-Sufficiency

Senior Living / Dear Doug /

Q: My husband passed away six years ago, and moving on has been a process. We were married for 37 years, and being on my own is strange, even now.

I never realized how much of my identity was formed by our relationship. We grew around each other with our own interests and talents. Beyond just missing my spouse, I've found myself having to ...Read more


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