Life Advice



Single File: Male-Bashing?

Susan Dietz on

DEAR SUSAN: You are still one of my favorite female journalists because you try, despite 40 years of male-bashing in the press (and schools), to be fair to men. Today, you did the usual male-bashing and likely didn't notice. You wrote, "Any woman worth her lip gloss knows that a good man nowadays is hard to find." The implication, from women's studies and often from their mouths, is that men are inferior to the many good women who are naturally superior. -- From the 'Single File' blog

DEAR BLOGGER: That one sentence has gotten me into more hot water than any I can recall having written. What is going on with this gender thing that a simple song lyric can set off a firestorm from both genders?! Yes, folks, that's what I was quoting, in all good humor and with no malice toward men -- and certainly no superiority complex as a female. This is utter craziness, my friends, when an advice columnist is taken to task for some words that were meant only to bring a small smile to the lips of both male and female. Wow! But I'm not cowed by some misreading, so I'll say it again: a good man nowadays is hard to find. And, for the record, so is a good woman. There -- I've said it. And I'll say it again, on demand, if readers want to see some good-natured kidding in print. Harrumph!

DEAR SUSAN: I read in "Single File" a letter from a man who often sees women he'd like to meet but is hesitant. Your reply is that it's far better --much less awkward and risky -- to meet through a mutual friend or a common interest. I agree, but it's not always possible. And then what? -- From the 'Single File' Blog

DEAR BLOGGER: Then -- the next best thing is to be aware when you go about your daily life encountering appealing people who might be worth at least a small "hello." You'd be amazed how many people you have the chance to meet each day, who you ignore and pass by. Making eye contact with the ones who interest you is a small but powerful beginning to what could be a very nice friendship. Meeting at a bakery counter, a newspaper stand, a bicycle depot, could be the start of something really nice. The path to friends is simple: Follow your interests -- and your values. If you attend a house of worship, keep your eyes open for a cute face under a small hat. Even a walk in the park could lead you to a hot dog stand and some nice people to talk to. That chat could lead to some friends of theirs, unattached like you and ready to chat with someone new. Keep your eyes open -- friend. Most everyone is looking for a friend. And we all know where that could lead.



We've uncovered another treasure trove of "Single File" paperbacks -- in perfect condition, signed by Susan, ready to enjoy. Send $15 and your address: Susan Deitz, C/O Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. Have a question for Susan? You can reach her directly at




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