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Is There Hope With My Ex-Husband?

Annie Lane on

Dear Annie: I've been married to a man for 17 years. But not long after the marriage, he stopped being a husband.

At first, we would talk, laugh and have fun. We would do things together, go places and, most of all, we would make love all the time. It's been 10 years since we have had sex.

When we did try, he couldn't fulfill. All he does now is pick fights. He blames me for things and does what he wants. He stays in the bedroom all the time. He yells when I ask for help with something.

He tells me I'm the crazy one. He makes me so mad that I hit him in the pocket and spend money. I know that's not the right thing to do. But I do it.

I ask him if he loves me and wants to stay in our marriage. He says yes, that he still loves me and wants our marriage to work.

However, when his best friend was alive, he would do everything for him, including giving him money. That was because his friend did not want to work. He lived in the mountains at our place until he died.

 

After that, things got worse. My husband, who I will call "Steve," bought a cabin in the mountains for his best friend's son.

He did this while telling me that we have no money to go away on a trip together.

You should know that I have kids from a previous marriage, and my ex-husband and I helped with some of their college expenses. My current husband, Steve, complained about that, yet at the same time, he is eager to give money to his dead friend's son.

So, do you think this is a marriage or just a convenience? Should I leave and quit wasting time? Please help. -- Frustrated Wife

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